Posts
This guy is...
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20081015/ap_on_re_us/king_confidant_charged;_ylt=Aql2Lvd6Ez90vbbPMafFHdxvzwcF
Read the whole article for yourself. It's bizarre. I'll touch on some highlights.
James L. Bevel was once a top man for Martin Luther King Jr. He organized the Children's Crusade in Alabama back in the 60's. The nationwide reaction to seeing children beaten, sprayed with fire hoses, and attacked by police dogs led to a lot of pressure being applied to pass the Civil Rights legislation. The guy's a hero.
Oh... wait. He fucks his daughters.
Bevel evidently parents under the notion that it's his fatherly duty to 'sexually-orient' his children. Yeah, it'd be a shame if they grew up to be lesbians. Nothing like a little dad-rape to get your head in the right place sexually.
Bevel was defiant when asked about apologizing. Hey, if you've been doing the sex with your daughters for decades, you're dying of cancer, and you've just been sentenced to 15 years in the joint, I can understand the 'fuck 'em all' attitude.
Wednesday, October 15, 2008
Voting Doesn't Make You Hero. It Makes You a Non-Prick
As I was logging into the Myspace just now, I saw one of their featured videos was Maggie Gyllenhaal imploring young people to vote. The caption said something to the effect that she wanted YOU to be a modern day hero, a status that could ostensibly be achieved by registering to vote. I thought 'Holy Ass I have got to see this.' Here's a link to the vid.
http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.individual&VideoID=44403943
To the actresses' credit, she never makes the assertion that voting makes you a hero. Also to her credit are the delicious sex scenes she has with Spader in 'The Secretary.'
It was the douche waffles that run the Myspace that make the outrageous claim that voting is heroic. It most certainly NOT heroic, it represents the bare minimum.
In my opinion voting ought to be mandatory. If you don't vote, you don't get the benefit of citizenship. You can't mail anything, you can't receive any government assistance, you can't even use the roads.
You may think that such a draconian policy runs counter to American traditions of democracy and freedom. To be honest, it's not much of a democracy and you're not all that free. If freedoms are limited for bad reasons, why shouldn't they be limited for a good reason? People should be forced to vote.
Not only that, but INFORMED voting should be mandatory. Citizens should be required to complete a pre-election, non partisan election primer course that covers local, state, and national issues.
It shouldn't be a choice.
http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.individual&VideoID=44403943
To the actresses' credit, she never makes the assertion that voting makes you a hero. Also to her credit are the delicious sex scenes she has with Spader in 'The Secretary.'
It was the douche waffles that run the Myspace that make the outrageous claim that voting is heroic. It most certainly NOT heroic, it represents the bare minimum.
In my opinion voting ought to be mandatory. If you don't vote, you don't get the benefit of citizenship. You can't mail anything, you can't receive any government assistance, you can't even use the roads.
You may think that such a draconian policy runs counter to American traditions of democracy and freedom. To be honest, it's not much of a democracy and you're not all that free. If freedoms are limited for bad reasons, why shouldn't they be limited for a good reason? People should be forced to vote.
Not only that, but INFORMED voting should be mandatory. Citizens should be required to complete a pre-election, non partisan election primer course that covers local, state, and national issues.
It shouldn't be a choice.
All This... For a Fucking Dog
WASHINGTON (AP) - A rescue group left Baghdad without a puppy
adopted by a Minnesota soldier, and blamed the U.S. military for
not clearing the animal in time for the flight out Wednesday.
The military responded that it did not hold "Ratchet" the dog
or order it to stay put at the U.S. military base.
The Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals
International says the military finally agreed to clear Ratchet to
leave the country. But that clearance came only 30 minutes before
the flight out - too late for the dog to make it.
The next rescue operation could come as soon as Sunday.
Army Sgt. Gwen Beberg, 28, of Minneapolis, who adopted Ratchet,
plans to return to the U.S. next month. More than 45,000 people
have signed an online petition urging the Army to let the puppy
come to the U.S.
This is insane.
You've got 45,000 people signing an online petition. If all those people moved to Bonesteel Souf Dakota, Bonesteel would easily become the third largest town in the state with a population of 45,250 people.
You've got a 'rescue group' flying into an ACTIVE WAR ZONE, and now planning a return trip.
All for a dog.
It's difficult to pick a place to start... Ok, say they get the dog, bring it back to the States, and hold it for Sgt. Beberg. What if she gets extended? What if something else happens? That means another homeless animal in America. Like there aren't enough of those. Why don't these people fly here and grab some of the 30 or so cats that are constantly running around Main Street?
The difference is those mangy ass cats weren't flown halfway across the world. I'm sure that if something happens there will be no problem finding a home for the dog, Ratchet, because now he's a celebrity, so to speak. This reminds me of Elian Gonzales in the 90's. You've got a cute little kid from Cuba who is photogenic and all of a sudden no one cares that he's an illegal. The same people who piss and moan about individuals who sneak into this country to 'put food on their families' thought that this kid had to be saved from the evils of his Cuban homeland. THEN the government sends and SWAT team into the house (I can only hope that this Ratchet situation wraps up in as entertaining a fashion). It was a total non story, just like this is, yet it gained traction in the media because people in America have no idea what is and what is not important.
At this point, it's unreasonable to expect anything more from the American people. The lines between 'news' and 'sensationalism' have been irreversably blurred. The millions of homeless animals in America that are put down in a year aren't news to anyone but PETA, but a tasty little story about ridiculous 'rescue operations' flying into Iraq to save one damn dog? That's front page material.
Can we get 45,000 people to sign a petition to ban corporations from shipping American jobs overseas? How about signing a petition to actually capture Osama Bin Laden? The soldier and her dog are not the point. I hope they have a very happy life together, considering the amount of effort that has gone into all of this. It's simply disturbing to consider the decisions being made by the people who control the output of information in this country.
Look, I know that all the people in Guantanamo Bay simply MUST be terrorist assholes who don't deserve fresh water to drink, let alone any semblance of personal rights. Yet, I can't help but be disturbed by the fact that people have been held for years (YEARS) and have never been charged with anything. This is rarely pointed out in the media. That, in a word, is atrocious. Something that people don't understand about this country's Bill of Rights is that it doesn't grant citizens any special protection. What it does is recognize that there are basic rights inherent to every person, and pledges that this govenrment will never interfere in those basic rights. In other words, you don't have the right to a fair and speedy trial because you are an American, you have that right because you are a human fucking being. I guess it doesn't count for brown people. That is a strong American tradition. It's the land of the free as long as you are white and believe in Jesus.
No one gives a shit, though. They want to watch CSI and dress their dogs up in little sweaters.
adopted by a Minnesota soldier, and blamed the U.S. military for
not clearing the animal in time for the flight out Wednesday.
The military responded that it did not hold "Ratchet" the dog
or order it to stay put at the U.S. military base.
The Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals
International says the military finally agreed to clear Ratchet to
leave the country. But that clearance came only 30 minutes before
the flight out - too late for the dog to make it.
The next rescue operation could come as soon as Sunday.
Army Sgt. Gwen Beberg, 28, of Minneapolis, who adopted Ratchet,
plans to return to the U.S. next month. More than 45,000 people
have signed an online petition urging the Army to let the puppy
come to the U.S.
This is insane.
You've got 45,000 people signing an online petition. If all those people moved to Bonesteel Souf Dakota, Bonesteel would easily become the third largest town in the state with a population of 45,250 people.
You've got a 'rescue group' flying into an ACTIVE WAR ZONE, and now planning a return trip.
All for a dog.
It's difficult to pick a place to start... Ok, say they get the dog, bring it back to the States, and hold it for Sgt. Beberg. What if she gets extended? What if something else happens? That means another homeless animal in America. Like there aren't enough of those. Why don't these people fly here and grab some of the 30 or so cats that are constantly running around Main Street?
The difference is those mangy ass cats weren't flown halfway across the world. I'm sure that if something happens there will be no problem finding a home for the dog, Ratchet, because now he's a celebrity, so to speak. This reminds me of Elian Gonzales in the 90's. You've got a cute little kid from Cuba who is photogenic and all of a sudden no one cares that he's an illegal. The same people who piss and moan about individuals who sneak into this country to 'put food on their families' thought that this kid had to be saved from the evils of his Cuban homeland. THEN the government sends and SWAT team into the house (I can only hope that this Ratchet situation wraps up in as entertaining a fashion). It was a total non story, just like this is, yet it gained traction in the media because people in America have no idea what is and what is not important.
At this point, it's unreasonable to expect anything more from the American people. The lines between 'news' and 'sensationalism' have been irreversably blurred. The millions of homeless animals in America that are put down in a year aren't news to anyone but PETA, but a tasty little story about ridiculous 'rescue operations' flying into Iraq to save one damn dog? That's front page material.
Can we get 45,000 people to sign a petition to ban corporations from shipping American jobs overseas? How about signing a petition to actually capture Osama Bin Laden? The soldier and her dog are not the point. I hope they have a very happy life together, considering the amount of effort that has gone into all of this. It's simply disturbing to consider the decisions being made by the people who control the output of information in this country.
Look, I know that all the people in Guantanamo Bay simply MUST be terrorist assholes who don't deserve fresh water to drink, let alone any semblance of personal rights. Yet, I can't help but be disturbed by the fact that people have been held for years (YEARS) and have never been charged with anything. This is rarely pointed out in the media. That, in a word, is atrocious. Something that people don't understand about this country's Bill of Rights is that it doesn't grant citizens any special protection. What it does is recognize that there are basic rights inherent to every person, and pledges that this govenrment will never interfere in those basic rights. In other words, you don't have the right to a fair and speedy trial because you are an American, you have that right because you are a human fucking being. I guess it doesn't count for brown people. That is a strong American tradition. It's the land of the free as long as you are white and believe in Jesus.
No one gives a shit, though. They want to watch CSI and dress their dogs up in little sweaters.
Monday, October 13, 2008
You Just Don't See Stuff Like This Outside of Iowa
OSAGE, Iowa (AP) - A Minnesota man is under arrest after
allegedly stealing a combine and taking it for drunken ride through
several yards and crashing into a garage.
Dominic Andrew Bjerke, of Leroy, Minnesota, has been charged
with first offense operating while intoxicated, third-degree
burglary, third-degree theft and criminal mischief as a Class C
felony.
According to the Mitchell County Sheriff's Office, deputies were
dispatched to a residence south of McIntire around 2:30 a.m. on
Sunday after receiving a complaint that a combine had driven
through several yards, striking numerous vehicles and a garage.
Deputies say they found the combine down the road and identified
Bjerke as the driver.
Authorities say the combine did significant damage to three
residences as well as several street signs and a bridge. Bjerke is
being held in Mitchell County Jail on a $26,000 bond.
I love this story. I can't really improve it with comment, so I'll let it stand. I'll simply say that some people know how to have a good time.
RUTLAND, S.D. (AP) - Rutland's homecoming queen was supposed to
bring in the game ball on a helicopter. But instead of landing on
the football field, the chopper went down in a corn field and
Ashley Olson wound up with a bump on her head.
Rutland Superintendent Carl Fahrenwald said the school wanted to
"have some fun with homecoming and make it a special event." A
crowd waited Friday night for the helicopter to bring Olson and the
football.
But the pilot, Brian Woldt, lost power and decided to make a
"cautionary set down" in a corn field northwest of town. He
suffered a cut to his ear and Olson's tiara cut her head.
School officials said Olson made it to the game, just a little
late and a little shaken up.
The idea of a helicopter dropping off a game ball at a high school football game is, in a word, awesome. Too bad this didn't work out.
allegedly stealing a combine and taking it for drunken ride through
several yards and crashing into a garage.
Dominic Andrew Bjerke, of Leroy, Minnesota, has been charged
with first offense operating while intoxicated, third-degree
burglary, third-degree theft and criminal mischief as a Class C
felony.
According to the Mitchell County Sheriff's Office, deputies were
dispatched to a residence south of McIntire around 2:30 a.m. on
Sunday after receiving a complaint that a combine had driven
through several yards, striking numerous vehicles and a garage.
Deputies say they found the combine down the road and identified
Bjerke as the driver.
Authorities say the combine did significant damage to three
residences as well as several street signs and a bridge. Bjerke is
being held in Mitchell County Jail on a $26,000 bond.
I love this story. I can't really improve it with comment, so I'll let it stand. I'll simply say that some people know how to have a good time.
RUTLAND, S.D. (AP) - Rutland's homecoming queen was supposed to
bring in the game ball on a helicopter. But instead of landing on
the football field, the chopper went down in a corn field and
Ashley Olson wound up with a bump on her head.
Rutland Superintendent Carl Fahrenwald said the school wanted to
"have some fun with homecoming and make it a special event." A
crowd waited Friday night for the helicopter to bring Olson and the
football.
But the pilot, Brian Woldt, lost power and decided to make a
"cautionary set down" in a corn field northwest of town. He
suffered a cut to his ear and Olson's tiara cut her head.
School officials said Olson made it to the game, just a little
late and a little shaken up.
The idea of a helicopter dropping off a game ball at a high school football game is, in a word, awesome. Too bad this didn't work out.
Saturday, October 11, 2008
How Do I Know Islam Is The Light? My Wal-Mart Doll Told Me
When are these Muslim assholes going to stop? First they try to get Barack HUSSEIN Obama elected president. As crazed fearful white woman Gayle Quinnell knows, Barack HUSSEIN Obama is little more that an arab terrorist
http://www.startribune.com/politics/state/30747614.html?elr=KArksLckD8EQDUoaEyqyP4O:DW3ckUiD3aPc:_Yyc:aULPQL7PQLanchO7DiUs
THEN they try to indoctrinate American youth via a doll sold by that most American of retailers, Wal-we get our merchandise from China-Mart.
http://www.parentdish.com/2008/10/10/doll-pulled-over-islamic-message/?icid=100214839x1211357358x1200687659
Religion, in general, is ridiculous. Islam is exceptionally ridiculous, even by the high standards that other religions set.
You think I'm going to drop everything I'm doing, face Mecca, and pray five times a day? Piss off. I've got important shit to do.
Thursday, October 9, 2008
Cat Owning Spinsters of Minnesota! Prepare For Glory!
GOLDEN VALLEY, Minn. (AP) - The Animal Humane Society in the
Twin Cities is asking the public to adopt a cat.
The organization says it's overrun with stray cats and kittens
that came in over the summer.
Nearly 10,000 cats came in from June through September. So far
this year, the Animal Humane Society has received more than 16,000
cats. That's an increase of 6 percent from the same period a year
ago.
Warmer weather in the spring and fall is increasing the number
of litters produced each year by cats that have not been spayed or
neutered.
Humane Society president and CEO Janelle Dixon says the
organization has more than 350 cats at its five location ready for
adoption right now.
Once in a lifetime, fate and circumstance collude to bring out the very best of a segment of the population. In October of 2008, the trumpet has sounded and lonely old cat women in the Twin Cities have been summoned to answer the call to greatness.
You! Yes, you! In the urine stained sweater. Will you accept additional cats into your home? Will you say 'I refuse to not have even more cats in my home?'
Saddle up and ride, you spinsters! Your time is now.
Twin Cities is asking the public to adopt a cat.
The organization says it's overrun with stray cats and kittens
that came in over the summer.
Nearly 10,000 cats came in from June through September. So far
this year, the Animal Humane Society has received more than 16,000
cats. That's an increase of 6 percent from the same period a year
ago.
Warmer weather in the spring and fall is increasing the number
of litters produced each year by cats that have not been spayed or
neutered.
Humane Society president and CEO Janelle Dixon says the
organization has more than 350 cats at its five location ready for
adoption right now.
Once in a lifetime, fate and circumstance collude to bring out the very best of a segment of the population. In October of 2008, the trumpet has sounded and lonely old cat women in the Twin Cities have been summoned to answer the call to greatness.
You! Yes, you! In the urine stained sweater. Will you accept additional cats into your home? Will you say 'I refuse to not have even more cats in my home?'
Saddle up and ride, you spinsters! Your time is now.
Be Careful Who You Invite to Watch You Masturbate On The Internet
LINCOLN, Neb. (AP) - A 45-year-old Trumbull man is facing felony
charges after allegedly encouraging someone to watch him commit a
lewd act on a webcam.
Attorney General Jon Bruning charged Kevin Fullerton with four
counts of enticement by electronic communication device.
Bruning said Thursday in a news release that Fullerton contacted
an Attorney General's Office investigator who was posing as an
underage girl on an instant messaging Web site. Fullerton
identified himself as a 45-year-old man living in the Hastings-Clay
Center area.
Bruning says Fullerton encouraged the investigator to view a
live video stream from his webcam of him masturbating several
times.
Each enticement charge carries a penalty of up to five years in
prison and a $10,000 fine.
Talk about a buzz kill. One minute you think you are wowing some teenage chippy with your masturbatory skills, the next you are getting busted by the Attorney General's Office. Sucks. Just goes to show, you have to be careful when you're a pedophile.
Is Fullerton being charged with seperate enticement charges for each masturbating session, or can he get a group rate? Also, I think he deserves some sort of pedo-credit for not lying about his age. Too many perverts lie about their age, and I for one think that is poor form.
In other news, the psychos from Westboro Baptist are back in the news
OMAHA, Neb. (AP) - A Kansas woman accused of flag desecration
and child endangerment is asking a Sarpy County judge to dismiss
the charges against her.
The attorney for Shirley Phelps-Roper argues that the case
against her amounts to persecution.
Authorities say Phelps-Roper let her 10-year-old son stand on an
American flag at the funeral of a National Guardsman in June 2007
in Bellevue. They also say she wore a flag as a skirt that dragged
the ground.
Phelps-Roper is a member of Westboro Baptist Church of Topeka,
Kan., which routinely protests the funerals of U.S. soldiers.
Church members contend that U.S. soldiers' deaths are punishment
for the nation's tolerance of homosexuality.
I almost have to hand it to the WBC. There is probably not another group of people in America that are as aware of their constitutional rights as they are. Too bad they choose to use their powers for evil.
Here's a question. In a war between the Westboro Baptists and NAMBLA, who would you want to win? Not sure what NAMBLA is? Here's a link
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/NAMBLA
The membership of NAMBLA is no doubt much larger than the WBC, which is made up mostly of the immediate and extended family of insane turd sniffer Fred Phelps. However, the WBC have to be the craziest fucks in America and they are fearless.
This guy may be an ally for the WBC
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/london/7655585.stm
charges after allegedly encouraging someone to watch him commit a
lewd act on a webcam.
Attorney General Jon Bruning charged Kevin Fullerton with four
counts of enticement by electronic communication device.
Bruning said Thursday in a news release that Fullerton contacted
an Attorney General's Office investigator who was posing as an
underage girl on an instant messaging Web site. Fullerton
identified himself as a 45-year-old man living in the Hastings-Clay
Center area.
Bruning says Fullerton encouraged the investigator to view a
live video stream from his webcam of him masturbating several
times.
Each enticement charge carries a penalty of up to five years in
prison and a $10,000 fine.
Talk about a buzz kill. One minute you think you are wowing some teenage chippy with your masturbatory skills, the next you are getting busted by the Attorney General's Office. Sucks. Just goes to show, you have to be careful when you're a pedophile.
Is Fullerton being charged with seperate enticement charges for each masturbating session, or can he get a group rate? Also, I think he deserves some sort of pedo-credit for not lying about his age. Too many perverts lie about their age, and I for one think that is poor form.
In other news, the psychos from Westboro Baptist are back in the news
OMAHA, Neb. (AP) - A Kansas woman accused of flag desecration
and child endangerment is asking a Sarpy County judge to dismiss
the charges against her.
The attorney for Shirley Phelps-Roper argues that the case
against her amounts to persecution.
Authorities say Phelps-Roper let her 10-year-old son stand on an
American flag at the funeral of a National Guardsman in June 2007
in Bellevue. They also say she wore a flag as a skirt that dragged
the ground.
Phelps-Roper is a member of Westboro Baptist Church of Topeka,
Kan., which routinely protests the funerals of U.S. soldiers.
Church members contend that U.S. soldiers' deaths are punishment
for the nation's tolerance of homosexuality.
I almost have to hand it to the WBC. There is probably not another group of people in America that are as aware of their constitutional rights as they are. Too bad they choose to use their powers for evil.
Here's a question. In a war between the Westboro Baptists and NAMBLA, who would you want to win? Not sure what NAMBLA is? Here's a link
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/NAMBLA
The membership of NAMBLA is no doubt much larger than the WBC, which is made up mostly of the immediate and extended family of insane turd sniffer Fred Phelps. However, the WBC have to be the craziest fucks in America and they are fearless.
This guy may be an ally for the WBC
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/london/7655585.stm
Wednesday, October 8, 2008
Shut Up and I'll Tell You How to Vote (Initiatives)
Like any good American I picked up a sample ballot from the Tripp County Courthouse in advance of the election so I have ample time to review the proposed amendments and initiatives, as well as make myself familiar with all the candidates for office. I took a long look at it, and since America is such a lazy nation that barely 50 percent of it's eligible citizens will vote, I know damn well that precious few of you will bother to review the ballot before the election. So... I did it for you. Now, shut up and I'll tell you how to vote.
Initiatives
There are three initiatives to consider.
Initiative 9 deals with outlawing the practice of 'short selling' stocks. I'm man enough to admit when I don't have a clue what something means. I've read as much as I can find about the new law, and I'm still not sure what it means. I do know that short selling means selling stock that you don't own, with the understanding that you will buy back the stock later. If the price drops you make a lot of money. Conspiracy theorists point to the short selling of many airline stocks directly prior to the 9/11 attacks as evidence that something foul was afoot. If the price goes up, like what happens to the villain in the Bond film 'Casino Royale', you lose your ass. As evidenced by the film, the practice of short selling often leads to stripping British Secret Agents nude, tying them to chairs, and clubbing them in the nuggets with a length of rope with a knot tied in the end of it. Then you will get shot by a mysterious operative for losing a hudred million clams of terrorist money.
Verdict: Evidently there already federal laws on the books outlawing this practice, though they often go unenforced, so even if the law is passed here, it will be struck down because the federal laws preempt it. I'll vote against it, simply because it seems superfluous.
Initiative 10
This one deals with prohibiting government or tribal entities from donating to campaigns, stopping tax money from being spent to promote proposed laws or campaigns, and prevent legislators and their families from benefiting from their stations.
Verdict: I'm all about accountability. Not from me, of course. From other people, politiicans in particular. This seems like a no brainer. Unfortunately, the leadership of the both the major state parties say that this bill is very poorly written, full of loop holes, and could cause a lot of trouble for a lot of people. Still, this could be the fearful mutterings of stodgy old politicos. I say fuck em, put it through. I'll vote yes.
Initiative 11
This is the big rodeo. It would prohibit abortions in the state of Souf Dakota, except in the case of rape or incest or in the case of a threat to the mothers health.
Verdict: There is a notion among the religious right in America that there exists a large segment of the population that just cannot wait to get pregnant so they can go have another abortion. I'm sure that segment does exist, just as there exists a segment of the population that will murder their families with a claw hammer. The truth is that abortions are not a whimsy. They aren't something you do for fun on a Tuesday afternoon. Souf Dakota already makes it harder than any other state do get an abortion, and requires doctors to tell women seeking an abortion that they are essentially killing a baby. I've switched sides in this debate in recent years. I used to be firmly pro-life. Now I think that I will never have to make this decision and I won't make it for someone else. I'm voting no.
Initiatives
There are three initiatives to consider.
Initiative 9 deals with outlawing the practice of 'short selling' stocks. I'm man enough to admit when I don't have a clue what something means. I've read as much as I can find about the new law, and I'm still not sure what it means. I do know that short selling means selling stock that you don't own, with the understanding that you will buy back the stock later. If the price drops you make a lot of money. Conspiracy theorists point to the short selling of many airline stocks directly prior to the 9/11 attacks as evidence that something foul was afoot. If the price goes up, like what happens to the villain in the Bond film 'Casino Royale', you lose your ass. As evidenced by the film, the practice of short selling often leads to stripping British Secret Agents nude, tying them to chairs, and clubbing them in the nuggets with a length of rope with a knot tied in the end of it. Then you will get shot by a mysterious operative for losing a hudred million clams of terrorist money.
Verdict: Evidently there already federal laws on the books outlawing this practice, though they often go unenforced, so even if the law is passed here, it will be struck down because the federal laws preempt it. I'll vote against it, simply because it seems superfluous.
Initiative 10
This one deals with prohibiting government or tribal entities from donating to campaigns, stopping tax money from being spent to promote proposed laws or campaigns, and prevent legislators and their families from benefiting from their stations.
Verdict: I'm all about accountability. Not from me, of course. From other people, politiicans in particular. This seems like a no brainer. Unfortunately, the leadership of the both the major state parties say that this bill is very poorly written, full of loop holes, and could cause a lot of trouble for a lot of people. Still, this could be the fearful mutterings of stodgy old politicos. I say fuck em, put it through. I'll vote yes.
Initiative 11
This is the big rodeo. It would prohibit abortions in the state of Souf Dakota, except in the case of rape or incest or in the case of a threat to the mothers health.
Verdict: There is a notion among the religious right in America that there exists a large segment of the population that just cannot wait to get pregnant so they can go have another abortion. I'm sure that segment does exist, just as there exists a segment of the population that will murder their families with a claw hammer. The truth is that abortions are not a whimsy. They aren't something you do for fun on a Tuesday afternoon. Souf Dakota already makes it harder than any other state do get an abortion, and requires doctors to tell women seeking an abortion that they are essentially killing a baby. I've switched sides in this debate in recent years. I used to be firmly pro-life. Now I think that I will never have to make this decision and I won't make it for someone else. I'm voting no.
Shut Up and I'll Tell You How to Vote (Amendments)
Like any good American I picked up a sample ballot from the Tripp County Courthouse in advance of the election so I have ample time to review the proposed amendments and initiatives, as well as make myself familiar with all the candidates for office. I took a long look at it, and since America is such a lazy nation that barely 50 percent of it's eligible citizens will vote, I know damn well that precious few of you will bother to review the ballot before the election. So... I did it for you. Now, shut up and I'll tell you how to vote.
Amendments
Not all the proposed constitutional amendments warrant considerable comment here.
Amendment G has to do with the amount state legislators are reimbursed for travel. Like many things in Souf Dakota, the amount per mile has not changed since 1891. A vote for this measure means the reimbursment restrictions from the state constitution will be removed.
Verdict: It's funny that the amount has not changed in over a century. I think if the amendment is not passed legislators should insist on traveling to Pierre on horseback.
Amendment H has to do with outdated (imagine that, in Souf Dakota) language in the constitution regarding corporations. It's a completion of a process begun in 2005.
Verdict: The state of Souf Dakota must have a firm policy of updating the language of the constitution every ten decades or so. Go ahead and cast your 21st century vote to bring the constitution into the 20th century. Up next... Color Televisions! Soon you'll be able to enjoy the latest Bob Hope special the way the show was meant to be enjoyed.
Amendment I deals with expanding the legislative session to a maximum of 40 days every year. Right now, they meet for 40 days in odd numbered years, and 35 in even years. Why? Who the hell knows.
Verdict: The state has a full time governor and a part time legislature. Granted, the concept of checks and balances and executive restraint has become a bit of a chuckler nationally in the last eight years. The whole idea is kind of cute, a quaint memory of the way things used to be, like your addled, bigoted great uncle who uses slurs at the Thanksgiving dinner table. The expanded session could put a financial burden in excess of 100 grand on the state, no laughing matter as they can't find enough money as it is to pay all their road construction bills. Me? I'll be voting in favor of the amendment. I like things to be even.
Amendment J is a big one. It would remove the voter approved term limits for legislators from the state constitution.
Verdict: Given my disdain for most politicians, it may be easy to assume that I am in favor of term limits. It's not as simple as that, sadly. No state legislator can serve more than 8 consecutive years. With such high turnover, you run the risk of the real power being turned over to lobbyists and special interests. There's no term limit for scum baggery. I think the real solution would be expanding the term limits from 8 to 16 years. If you can't figure out what the hell you are doing in 16 years you are an idiot and shouldn't be in office anyway. Since that is not an option I imagine I'll vote against the amendment to keep the term limits for the time being.
Amendments
Not all the proposed constitutional amendments warrant considerable comment here.
Amendment G has to do with the amount state legislators are reimbursed for travel. Like many things in Souf Dakota, the amount per mile has not changed since 1891. A vote for this measure means the reimbursment restrictions from the state constitution will be removed.
Verdict: It's funny that the amount has not changed in over a century. I think if the amendment is not passed legislators should insist on traveling to Pierre on horseback.
Amendment H has to do with outdated (imagine that, in Souf Dakota) language in the constitution regarding corporations. It's a completion of a process begun in 2005.
Verdict: The state of Souf Dakota must have a firm policy of updating the language of the constitution every ten decades or so. Go ahead and cast your 21st century vote to bring the constitution into the 20th century. Up next... Color Televisions! Soon you'll be able to enjoy the latest Bob Hope special the way the show was meant to be enjoyed.
Amendment I deals with expanding the legislative session to a maximum of 40 days every year. Right now, they meet for 40 days in odd numbered years, and 35 in even years. Why? Who the hell knows.
Verdict: The state has a full time governor and a part time legislature. Granted, the concept of checks and balances and executive restraint has become a bit of a chuckler nationally in the last eight years. The whole idea is kind of cute, a quaint memory of the way things used to be, like your addled, bigoted great uncle who uses slurs at the Thanksgiving dinner table. The expanded session could put a financial burden in excess of 100 grand on the state, no laughing matter as they can't find enough money as it is to pay all their road construction bills. Me? I'll be voting in favor of the amendment. I like things to be even.
Amendment J is a big one. It would remove the voter approved term limits for legislators from the state constitution.
Verdict: Given my disdain for most politicians, it may be easy to assume that I am in favor of term limits. It's not as simple as that, sadly. No state legislator can serve more than 8 consecutive years. With such high turnover, you run the risk of the real power being turned over to lobbyists and special interests. There's no term limit for scum baggery. I think the real solution would be expanding the term limits from 8 to 16 years. If you can't figure out what the hell you are doing in 16 years you are an idiot and shouldn't be in office anyway. Since that is not an option I imagine I'll vote against the amendment to keep the term limits for the time being.
You Know It's Over When They Send the Robots After You
It is getting harder and harder to get a fix these days...
SYRACUSE, Neb. (AP) - The Otoe County sheriff says a 27-year-old
Syracuse man is in stable condition at a hospital after his capture
ended a nearly 5-hour standoff inside a downtown pharmacy.
Sheriff James Gress says in a news release that any charges
resulting from the incident will be determined by the county
attorney.
Authorities say the man walked into the Town & Country Pharmacy
around 3:30 yesterday afternoon, brandishing what looked like a
semiautomatic pistol. The man demanded drugs.
Five people in the store left safely.
Gress' deputies soon responded, set up a perimeter and called
for help from the Nebraska State Patrol.
The man was apprehended after a patrol bomb robot was sent into
the pharmacy, and its surveillance camera showed the man was
face-down on the floor.
America is becoming a police state. All the guy wants to do is party with some prescription pills, just like our fore fathers would have if they had had oxycontin back in the 1770's, and the fascists send a robot in after him. Unbelievable.
In more news...
MITCHELL, S.D. (AP) - After serving for nine years, Pam
Engelland, the director of the Corn Palace Convention and Visitors
Bureau has been fired. And she doesn't know why.
Engelland says she just had a positive job review and got a
raise.
She says she was handed three months' severance pay and given no
reason for her firing during a Friday meeting with her supervisor.
Engelland says the only thing she can think of is that she's --
in her words -- a "get 'er done-style person" and will confront
issues with co-workers head on.
She says she doesn't think her firing was related to tourism
numbers or a lack of success, pointing to a 75 percent increase in
scheduled group tour business this summer.
The lesson that we learn from this is that anyone that will refer to themselves as a 'get 'er done style person' does not deserve to be employed in any capacity anywhere. Even in Mitchell Souf Dakota.
OMAHA, Neb. (AP) - A 25-year-old Omaha woman accused of showing
her 4-year-old daughter how to smoke marijuana has been sentenced
to probation.
Lisa Schuchard pleaded no contest in August to misdemeanor child
neglect.
Douglas County District Judge Russell Bowie sentenced Schuchard
on Wednesday to two years of intensive supervised probation. If she
fails to comply with the terms of the probation, she must serve a
90-day jail sentence.
Schuchard was arrested in February after police found her two
young children living in a filthy home with drugs and a gun within
their reach.
According to police, the girl told officers Schuchard and her
boyfriend would offer her and her younger brother marijuana, then
laugh with friends when the children smoked.
Wow. Even someone like me, who already has an exceptionally low opinion of the nature of humans, can get caught off guard by how stupid and criminal some people are. The tragedy of this is not only that there are kids who have to suffer abominable fools for parents such as these clowns, but what the future holds for the kids. What are the odds that they will grow up to be anything other than what their parents are? At the age of 4 this girl is damned to a life of poverty, drug use, and generally being an ass hat.
There's a chance that the kids can change their fortunes through hard work, but very few under the age of 30 want to work hard in America these days.
SYRACUSE, Neb. (AP) - The Otoe County sheriff says a 27-year-old
Syracuse man is in stable condition at a hospital after his capture
ended a nearly 5-hour standoff inside a downtown pharmacy.
Sheriff James Gress says in a news release that any charges
resulting from the incident will be determined by the county
attorney.
Authorities say the man walked into the Town & Country Pharmacy
around 3:30 yesterday afternoon, brandishing what looked like a
semiautomatic pistol. The man demanded drugs.
Five people in the store left safely.
Gress' deputies soon responded, set up a perimeter and called
for help from the Nebraska State Patrol.
The man was apprehended after a patrol bomb robot was sent into
the pharmacy, and its surveillance camera showed the man was
face-down on the floor.
America is becoming a police state. All the guy wants to do is party with some prescription pills, just like our fore fathers would have if they had had oxycontin back in the 1770's, and the fascists send a robot in after him. Unbelievable.
In more news...
MITCHELL, S.D. (AP) - After serving for nine years, Pam
Engelland, the director of the Corn Palace Convention and Visitors
Bureau has been fired. And she doesn't know why.
Engelland says she just had a positive job review and got a
raise.
She says she was handed three months' severance pay and given no
reason for her firing during a Friday meeting with her supervisor.
Engelland says the only thing she can think of is that she's --
in her words -- a "get 'er done-style person" and will confront
issues with co-workers head on.
She says she doesn't think her firing was related to tourism
numbers or a lack of success, pointing to a 75 percent increase in
scheduled group tour business this summer.
The lesson that we learn from this is that anyone that will refer to themselves as a 'get 'er done style person' does not deserve to be employed in any capacity anywhere. Even in Mitchell Souf Dakota.
OMAHA, Neb. (AP) - A 25-year-old Omaha woman accused of showing
her 4-year-old daughter how to smoke marijuana has been sentenced
to probation.
Lisa Schuchard pleaded no contest in August to misdemeanor child
neglect.
Douglas County District Judge Russell Bowie sentenced Schuchard
on Wednesday to two years of intensive supervised probation. If she
fails to comply with the terms of the probation, she must serve a
90-day jail sentence.
Schuchard was arrested in February after police found her two
young children living in a filthy home with drugs and a gun within
their reach.
According to police, the girl told officers Schuchard and her
boyfriend would offer her and her younger brother marijuana, then
laugh with friends when the children smoked.
Wow. Even someone like me, who already has an exceptionally low opinion of the nature of humans, can get caught off guard by how stupid and criminal some people are. The tragedy of this is not only that there are kids who have to suffer abominable fools for parents such as these clowns, but what the future holds for the kids. What are the odds that they will grow up to be anything other than what their parents are? At the age of 4 this girl is damned to a life of poverty, drug use, and generally being an ass hat.
There's a chance that the kids can change their fortunes through hard work, but very few under the age of 30 want to work hard in America these days.
Tuesday, October 7, 2008
Shut Up And Let Me Tell You How To Vote (State and National Reps, Senators)
Like any good American I picked up a sample ballot from the Tripp County Courthouse in advance of the election so I have ample time to review the proposed amendments and initiatives, as well as make myself familiar with all the candidates for office. I took a long look at it, and since America is such a lazy nation that barely 50 percent of it's eligible citizens will vote, I know damn well that precious few of you will bother to review the ballot before the election. So... I did it for you. Now, shut up and I'll tell you how to vote.
U.S. Senate
The battle in Souf Dakota is between Tim Johnson (D) and Joel Dykstra (R). Johnson is an incumbent Democrat in a Republican state who has enjoyed some of the highest approval ratings in the entirety of the United States Senate. This race wouldn't even be worth mentioning if it weren't for the fact that Johnson suffered a titanic stroke that has left him barely able to verbally communicate.
I realize that I'm looking at this situation differently than most people, but it's like this... Tim Johnson has replaced Strom Thurmond as the face of the 'lifer' politician. With no term limits there are some motherfuckers who won't release the reigns of power until handlers are wheeling their corpse out of the Sentate chambers when their bodies, finally, die. Tim Johnson could have designated his successor and they could have taken this election in a walk. He didn't, because it's not about what's best for Souf Dakota and it's not about what's best for the nation. It's about party politics and the refusal to step back no matter what happens.
That, and no other reason, is why I'm voting for Joel Dykstra. I doubt it will matter, I think Johnson will roll come November.
U.S. Congress
Stephanie Herseth Sandlin (D) is your incumbent here, opposed by Chris Lein (R). I like Herseth Sandlin, I like that she went against her party and initially opposed the bailout. She'll be getting my vote.
State Senate and State Representative
It is my policy to vote against incumbents unless I like them, for example, I supported Chuck Hagel in 2002, but when it comes to state elections, I almost always vote for the challenger because I believe it's like sending a little 'Screw You, Work Harder' to the politicians. In my district the incumbents are Julie Bartling and Kim Vanneman, the challengers and John Koskan and Thomas J. Glover. I freely admit that I still have to educate myself on these candidates, but Bartling and Vanneman will have to really move me to get my vote. Doesn't matter, incumbents win the majority of the time.
U.S. Senate
The battle in Souf Dakota is between Tim Johnson (D) and Joel Dykstra (R). Johnson is an incumbent Democrat in a Republican state who has enjoyed some of the highest approval ratings in the entirety of the United States Senate. This race wouldn't even be worth mentioning if it weren't for the fact that Johnson suffered a titanic stroke that has left him barely able to verbally communicate.
I realize that I'm looking at this situation differently than most people, but it's like this... Tim Johnson has replaced Strom Thurmond as the face of the 'lifer' politician. With no term limits there are some motherfuckers who won't release the reigns of power until handlers are wheeling their corpse out of the Sentate chambers when their bodies, finally, die. Tim Johnson could have designated his successor and they could have taken this election in a walk. He didn't, because it's not about what's best for Souf Dakota and it's not about what's best for the nation. It's about party politics and the refusal to step back no matter what happens.
That, and no other reason, is why I'm voting for Joel Dykstra. I doubt it will matter, I think Johnson will roll come November.
U.S. Congress
Stephanie Herseth Sandlin (D) is your incumbent here, opposed by Chris Lein (R). I like Herseth Sandlin, I like that she went against her party and initially opposed the bailout. She'll be getting my vote.
State Senate and State Representative
It is my policy to vote against incumbents unless I like them, for example, I supported Chuck Hagel in 2002, but when it comes to state elections, I almost always vote for the challenger because I believe it's like sending a little 'Screw You, Work Harder' to the politicians. In my district the incumbents are Julie Bartling and Kim Vanneman, the challengers and John Koskan and Thomas J. Glover. I freely admit that I still have to educate myself on these candidates, but Bartling and Vanneman will have to really move me to get my vote. Doesn't matter, incumbents win the majority of the time.
Shut Up And Let Me Tell You How to Vote (Presidency)
Like any good American I picked up a sample ballot from the Tripp County Courthouse in advance of the election so I have ample time to review the proposed amendments and initiatives, as well as make myself familiar with all the candidates for office. I took a long look at it, and since America is such a lazy nation that barely 50 percent of it's eligible citizens will vote, I know damn well that precious few of you will bother to review the ballot before the election. So... I did it for you. Now, shut up and I'll tell you how to vote.
Presidential Election:
5 groups of electors, you've got the big boys (McCain/Palin and Obama/Biden), plus Constitutional party candidates Baldwin/Castle, Libertarians (even though they are listed as independant) Barr/Root, and the ever present Nader ticket. Let's break it down.
The Democrats: The concerns about Obama's lack of experience are legitimate but overblown. He's smart and a communicator, which this country deperately needs after 8 years of Forrest Gump's even more retarded cousin calling the shots. The only thing I like about Joe Biden is that waaaay back in the early going of the election when he was still in the running for president he described Obama as clean and articulate, providing one of the more amusing 'Bill O'Reilly went to Harlem and was Surprised That No One Threw a Spear at Him' moments of the campaign.
The lesser of two evils, they won't win Souf Dakota but hopefully they'll win the general election.
The Republicans: Cancerface McCain and Sarah Palin represent one of the most bizarre tickets in the history of American politics. John McCain can talk all he wants about being a maverick. He really talks with his voting record, and in the past 8 years he has sided with the Bush Administration 90% of the time. The most disturbing aspect of McCain is that even though he was the victim of disgusting political ploys (involving his family) courtesy of the Bushies in 2000, he has been tongue kissing Bush in public for five years now. I don't understand how anyone can vote for the McCain ticket and keep a straight face. That is BEFORE you consider the Veep candidate, Sarah Palin. Smarter, funnier people than I have already eviscerated the overwhelmingly unqualified Palin, so all I will say is that if the Republicans win in november, come 2012, the Democrats will tab a seal that can bounce a ball on it's nose as the vice presidential candidate. That is ONLY POSSIBLE stunt that could exceed the lipstick wearing pitbull in irresponsibility and audacity.
Hey, did you know that McCain was a POW during Nam? I wonder why he doesn't mention it more often.
Constitutional Party: I was intrigued when I saw these guys on the ballot, so I looked up Chuck Baldwin on the Google. I winced when I saw that he is a pastor with a bible degree from Liberty, which would qualify him for a position in the Bush Administration Justice department but nothing else, not even waiting tables at Denny's or being a squeegee man.
I then reminded myself that I was being a bigot dismissing the man based solely on his Christ-y-ness, so I read on. While skimming the paragraph detailing his reasons for running for President, I noticed the words 'God's Will', closed the page and never went back.
Do not vote for this man. He does have Ron Paul's endorsment, which will mean something to some people.
Libertarians: Bob Barr is a reformed republican who was one of the leading torch and pitchfork wielding villagers that impeached President Clinton in the 90's. He also used to be a big war on drugs and defense of marriage guy. NOW he's a libertarian, which means he thinks that the federal government should not have the authority to determine such things, that it should rest with the states. As I've become more bitter and paranoid I've found myself agreeing more and more with libertarian philosophy, so I imagine I'll probably be voting for Barr, even though I think he's a turd waffle. You should too. It's not like he's going to win, but if the Libertarians get enough votes they will qualify for federal election money which will help them mount a real campaign in four years. The deck is incredibly stacked against even the remote possibility of a legitimate third party ever rising, but if it's ever going to happen it will have to be the people that will it to be so.
Nader: I admire Ralph Nader. In fact, I believe he is a top notch American, one of the greatest men in the last 50 years. That being said, it's time to take Ol' Yeller behind the shed and shoot him. Is there no one, not ONE damn person who can take up Nader's mantle? That is a sad commentary on the state of this nation.
Bottom line: Vote Obama or Barr.
Presidential Election:
5 groups of electors, you've got the big boys (McCain/Palin and Obama/Biden), plus Constitutional party candidates Baldwin/Castle, Libertarians (even though they are listed as independant) Barr/Root, and the ever present Nader ticket. Let's break it down.
The Democrats: The concerns about Obama's lack of experience are legitimate but overblown. He's smart and a communicator, which this country deperately needs after 8 years of Forrest Gump's even more retarded cousin calling the shots. The only thing I like about Joe Biden is that waaaay back in the early going of the election when he was still in the running for president he described Obama as clean and articulate, providing one of the more amusing 'Bill O'Reilly went to Harlem and was Surprised That No One Threw a Spear at Him' moments of the campaign.
The lesser of two evils, they won't win Souf Dakota but hopefully they'll win the general election.
The Republicans: Cancerface McCain and Sarah Palin represent one of the most bizarre tickets in the history of American politics. John McCain can talk all he wants about being a maverick. He really talks with his voting record, and in the past 8 years he has sided with the Bush Administration 90% of the time. The most disturbing aspect of McCain is that even though he was the victim of disgusting political ploys (involving his family) courtesy of the Bushies in 2000, he has been tongue kissing Bush in public for five years now. I don't understand how anyone can vote for the McCain ticket and keep a straight face. That is BEFORE you consider the Veep candidate, Sarah Palin. Smarter, funnier people than I have already eviscerated the overwhelmingly unqualified Palin, so all I will say is that if the Republicans win in november, come 2012, the Democrats will tab a seal that can bounce a ball on it's nose as the vice presidential candidate. That is ONLY POSSIBLE stunt that could exceed the lipstick wearing pitbull in irresponsibility and audacity.
Hey, did you know that McCain was a POW during Nam? I wonder why he doesn't mention it more often.
Constitutional Party: I was intrigued when I saw these guys on the ballot, so I looked up Chuck Baldwin on the Google. I winced when I saw that he is a pastor with a bible degree from Liberty, which would qualify him for a position in the Bush Administration Justice department but nothing else, not even waiting tables at Denny's or being a squeegee man.
I then reminded myself that I was being a bigot dismissing the man based solely on his Christ-y-ness, so I read on. While skimming the paragraph detailing his reasons for running for President, I noticed the words 'God's Will', closed the page and never went back.
Do not vote for this man. He does have Ron Paul's endorsment, which will mean something to some people.
Libertarians: Bob Barr is a reformed republican who was one of the leading torch and pitchfork wielding villagers that impeached President Clinton in the 90's. He also used to be a big war on drugs and defense of marriage guy. NOW he's a libertarian, which means he thinks that the federal government should not have the authority to determine such things, that it should rest with the states. As I've become more bitter and paranoid I've found myself agreeing more and more with libertarian philosophy, so I imagine I'll probably be voting for Barr, even though I think he's a turd waffle. You should too. It's not like he's going to win, but if the Libertarians get enough votes they will qualify for federal election money which will help them mount a real campaign in four years. The deck is incredibly stacked against even the remote possibility of a legitimate third party ever rising, but if it's ever going to happen it will have to be the people that will it to be so.
Nader: I admire Ralph Nader. In fact, I believe he is a top notch American, one of the greatest men in the last 50 years. That being said, it's time to take Ol' Yeller behind the shed and shoot him. Is there no one, not ONE damn person who can take up Nader's mantle? That is a sad commentary on the state of this nation.
Bottom line: Vote Obama or Barr.
UPDATE: Now They Are All Throwing Themselves in Front of Combines
Ah, the whimsical innocence of last spring, when flowers were blooming, birds were singing, and the economy was merely slumping and not pooping on everyone's living room floor.
LINCOLN, Neb. (AP) - A poll taken before the national financial
meltdown suggests that rural Nebraskans are far more optimistic
about their lives than they have been in years.
The Nebraska Rural Poll was taken in spring, before the economic
upheaval that some people say is the most alarming since the Great
Depression.
Surveys for the 13th annual University of Nebraska-Lincoln poll
were mailed to about 6,200 randomly selected households in 84 rural
Nebraska counties last spring. Results are based on 2,496
responses.
About 53 percent of the respondents say they felt better off
than they were five years ago. That's the highest number in the
poll's history. The figure was 44 percent in spring 2007.
I'd LOVE to see what the results would be now.
Personally, the effect of the destruction of our national economy hasn't made much of an impact on my life. Hell, gas prices are the lowest they've been in a long time. I haven't seen it today, but I heard a rumor around the station that gas is under three bucks a gallon. So... that's nice.
Nothing has changed for me because I'm poor. I don't have any tanking investments because I don't have any investments period. Sure I couldn't qualify for a bank loan tomorrow, but I couldn't qualify for a loan yesterday, either. My credit score is a joke and that won't change for years no matter what happens nationally. By the way, how effective was the 850 billion dollar bailout. The Dow Jones is only down about 1000 points since they passed the thing. Way to go guys.
The bailout was a stupid idea, and now it has become a stupid reality. Let me put it to you like this...
I am terrible with money. Terrible shitty stupid awful with money. I borrowed waaaaay too much in student loans for what is not even a nationally accredited degree. I should have gone to the University of Phoenix Online, it would have saved me a shit load of money and the degrees have about the same amount of credibility. Not only that but I have credit card debt, over drawn checking account debt, I have knowingly written bad checks, etc. I am the real deal when it comes to finances. Unethical, incorrigible, and not likely to change much in the coming years. In other words, I'm like AIG. Or Lehman Brothers. Or any one of the other monstrous corporations that now have the government saving their ass.
So where's my fuckin bailout? What makes the bankers worthy of salvation and me a scumbag? The difference is that I haven't done it on a grand enough scale. THAT is my problem. I am a fuckup and it means thousands in debt. These people are fuckups and it means billions in debt.
Bottom line, you can do whatever you want, and if you do it big enough not only will you not have to face anything even approaching a consequence, but the government will come in and wipe your ass for you. Unbelievable.
Like I said though, it doesn't mean much of a change for me. I'm too poor.
LINCOLN, Neb. (AP) - A poll taken before the national financial
meltdown suggests that rural Nebraskans are far more optimistic
about their lives than they have been in years.
The Nebraska Rural Poll was taken in spring, before the economic
upheaval that some people say is the most alarming since the Great
Depression.
Surveys for the 13th annual University of Nebraska-Lincoln poll
were mailed to about 6,200 randomly selected households in 84 rural
Nebraska counties last spring. Results are based on 2,496
responses.
About 53 percent of the respondents say they felt better off
than they were five years ago. That's the highest number in the
poll's history. The figure was 44 percent in spring 2007.
I'd LOVE to see what the results would be now.
Personally, the effect of the destruction of our national economy hasn't made much of an impact on my life. Hell, gas prices are the lowest they've been in a long time. I haven't seen it today, but I heard a rumor around the station that gas is under three bucks a gallon. So... that's nice.
Nothing has changed for me because I'm poor. I don't have any tanking investments because I don't have any investments period. Sure I couldn't qualify for a bank loan tomorrow, but I couldn't qualify for a loan yesterday, either. My credit score is a joke and that won't change for years no matter what happens nationally. By the way, how effective was the 850 billion dollar bailout. The Dow Jones is only down about 1000 points since they passed the thing. Way to go guys.
The bailout was a stupid idea, and now it has become a stupid reality. Let me put it to you like this...
I am terrible with money. Terrible shitty stupid awful with money. I borrowed waaaaay too much in student loans for what is not even a nationally accredited degree. I should have gone to the University of Phoenix Online, it would have saved me a shit load of money and the degrees have about the same amount of credibility. Not only that but I have credit card debt, over drawn checking account debt, I have knowingly written bad checks, etc. I am the real deal when it comes to finances. Unethical, incorrigible, and not likely to change much in the coming years. In other words, I'm like AIG. Or Lehman Brothers. Or any one of the other monstrous corporations that now have the government saving their ass.
So where's my fuckin bailout? What makes the bankers worthy of salvation and me a scumbag? The difference is that I haven't done it on a grand enough scale. THAT is my problem. I am a fuckup and it means thousands in debt. These people are fuckups and it means billions in debt.
Bottom line, you can do whatever you want, and if you do it big enough not only will you not have to face anything even approaching a consequence, but the government will come in and wipe your ass for you. Unbelievable.
Like I said though, it doesn't mean much of a change for me. I'm too poor.
Monday, October 6, 2008
Sorry Guys... I Think You're Terrorists
ST. PAUL, Minn. (AP) - They pretended to throw firebombs at cars
and buildings. Met in training camps to talk about guerrilla
warfare, kidnapping and bomb-making. Drew up maps detailing
possible targets.
The eight people arrested ahead of the Republican National
Convention are members of an anarchist group called the RNC
Welcoming Committee.
They say they were just exercising their protest rights. But
each now faces a felony charge accusing them of advancing
terrorism. And that's raising questions about who qualifies as a
"terrorist."
Prosecutors say the defendants created fear in an attempt to
keep delegates from attending the convention.
But civil rights advocates say prosecutors are misusing a
statute that defines terrorism too broadly.
It's no small distinction. The defendants face up to
seven-and-a-half years in prison if convicted.
Look, mainstream republicanism is a fraud, as evidenced by the nomination of Sarah Palin, the most under-qualified major party candidate in the history of the universe, as vice president. I want bad things to happen to these people in that I want them to never sit in seats of power again.
I do worry, however, that the RNC Welcoming Committee went a step or two too far. How does one 'pretend' to throw a firebomb?
If these guys had brown skin they would already be in Guantanamo Bay.
LA VISTA, Neb. (AP) - A conference focusing on Latino student
achievement and challenges is expected to draw more than 600
educators, students and parents from across the state Monday.
The daylong Hispanic/Latino Education Summit will include more
than two dozen informational sessions focusing on everything from
college preparation to services for migrant students in Nebraska.
The Nebraska Department of Education and the state
Mexican-American Commission are partnering for the event at the
Embassy Suites Conference Center in La Vista.
Summit organizers say the state has seen a 171 percent increase
in Hispanic and Latino students since 1991.
Organizers have tried to gear many of the sessions to attract
students and families.
Everything I know about Latino culture I learned from 'West Side Story,' so I imagine that the hispanic education system has classes like 'choreographed rumbling' and 'advanced synchronized snapping.'
and buildings. Met in training camps to talk about guerrilla
warfare, kidnapping and bomb-making. Drew up maps detailing
possible targets.
The eight people arrested ahead of the Republican National
Convention are members of an anarchist group called the RNC
Welcoming Committee.
They say they were just exercising their protest rights. But
each now faces a felony charge accusing them of advancing
terrorism. And that's raising questions about who qualifies as a
"terrorist."
Prosecutors say the defendants created fear in an attempt to
keep delegates from attending the convention.
But civil rights advocates say prosecutors are misusing a
statute that defines terrorism too broadly.
It's no small distinction. The defendants face up to
seven-and-a-half years in prison if convicted.
Look, mainstream republicanism is a fraud, as evidenced by the nomination of Sarah Palin, the most under-qualified major party candidate in the history of the universe, as vice president. I want bad things to happen to these people in that I want them to never sit in seats of power again.
I do worry, however, that the RNC Welcoming Committee went a step or two too far. How does one 'pretend' to throw a firebomb?
If these guys had brown skin they would already be in Guantanamo Bay.
LA VISTA, Neb. (AP) - A conference focusing on Latino student
achievement and challenges is expected to draw more than 600
educators, students and parents from across the state Monday.
The daylong Hispanic/Latino Education Summit will include more
than two dozen informational sessions focusing on everything from
college preparation to services for migrant students in Nebraska.
The Nebraska Department of Education and the state
Mexican-American Commission are partnering for the event at the
Embassy Suites Conference Center in La Vista.
Summit organizers say the state has seen a 171 percent increase
in Hispanic and Latino students since 1991.
Organizers have tried to gear many of the sessions to attract
students and families.
Everything I know about Latino culture I learned from 'West Side Story,' so I imagine that the hispanic education system has classes like 'choreographed rumbling' and 'advanced synchronized snapping.'
So... Is Anyone Going to Drop off an Actual Baby Ever?
OMAHA, Neb. (AP) - Two more children have been left at hospitals
under the state's safe-haven law, bringing to 16 the number of kids
abandoned.
The Nebraska Department of Health and Human Services says two
12-year-old boys were left Sunday, one at Omaha's Immanuel Medical
Center and the other at Lincoln's BryanLGH Medical Center West.
The law lets anyone leave a child of any age at any
state-licensed hospital without fear of prosecution for
abandonment. It took effect in July.
All the children left to date have been teenagers or preteens.
Health officials continue to stress the need for parents to seek
other resources, including help from family, faith-based groups and
other community services before resorting to abandonment.
Bottom line: the safe haven law was passed with infants in mind. Leave it to Nebraska's Unicameral to leave a loop hole so huge you could drive a bus full of unwanted preteens through, but the fact remains that the law is intended to protect infants. Ammend the thing immediately.
It's not that I don't get how hard it is to be a parent. I usually can't go more than five minutes around a kid, any kid, before I want to lock them outside. I have no idea how kids can be raised without hitting. Still, don't make your kids everybody else's problem unless it's an absolute last resort. Of course, if your kid is like this little guy
http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,432085,00.html
then I understand.
Big ups to Tovi for the link.
Here's another tovi-licious link
http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,432105,00.html
I would have tried the gum, myself.
under the state's safe-haven law, bringing to 16 the number of kids
abandoned.
The Nebraska Department of Health and Human Services says two
12-year-old boys were left Sunday, one at Omaha's Immanuel Medical
Center and the other at Lincoln's BryanLGH Medical Center West.
The law lets anyone leave a child of any age at any
state-licensed hospital without fear of prosecution for
abandonment. It took effect in July.
All the children left to date have been teenagers or preteens.
Health officials continue to stress the need for parents to seek
other resources, including help from family, faith-based groups and
other community services before resorting to abandonment.
Bottom line: the safe haven law was passed with infants in mind. Leave it to Nebraska's Unicameral to leave a loop hole so huge you could drive a bus full of unwanted preteens through, but the fact remains that the law is intended to protect infants. Ammend the thing immediately.
It's not that I don't get how hard it is to be a parent. I usually can't go more than five minutes around a kid, any kid, before I want to lock them outside. I have no idea how kids can be raised without hitting. Still, don't make your kids everybody else's problem unless it's an absolute last resort. Of course, if your kid is like this little guy
http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,432085,00.html
then I understand.
Big ups to Tovi for the link.
Here's another tovi-licious link
http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,432105,00.html
I would have tried the gum, myself.
Some People Are Just Asking to be Fleeced
KEARNEY, Neb. (AP) - Forget about going crazy during vacation.
Many Americans are using their vacation time to build on their
religious faith.
Kevin Wright is president of the World Religious Travel
Association. He will let the Nebraska tourism industry know how it
can get a piece of this growing market at the Nebraska Travel
Conference in Kearney.
The World Religious Travel Association says one in four
Americans rank church and religious travel as important.
Wright will teach people about the faith tourism market, which
includes pilgrimages, leisure vacations, short getaways and
retreats.
The conference will take place Oct. 21 through Oct. 23 at the
Kearney Ramada Inn and Conference Center.
Kevin Wright is president of the World Religious TravelAssociation. He will let the Nebraska tourism industry know how it can get a piece of this growing market at the Nebraska Travel Conference in Kearney.
Many Americans are using their vacation time to build on their
religious faith.
Kevin Wright is president of the World Religious Travel
Association. He will let the Nebraska tourism industry know how it
can get a piece of this growing market at the Nebraska Travel
Conference in Kearney.
The World Religious Travel Association says one in four
Americans rank church and religious travel as important.
Wright will teach people about the faith tourism market, which
includes pilgrimages, leisure vacations, short getaways and
retreats.
The conference will take place Oct. 21 through Oct. 23 at the
Kearney Ramada Inn and Conference Center.
There are a few aspects of this story that I think are funny. The first is...
What percentage of those pilgrimages are of the 'driving to Alabama to look at a cheeto that someone thinks looks like Jesus' face' variety? The only thing more insane than someone seeing an image of Jesus in their breakfast cereal are other people that travel to see it.
Funny thing number two...Kevin Wright is president of the World Religious TravelAssociation. He will let the Nebraska tourism industry know how it can get a piece of this growing market at the Nebraska Travel Conference in Kearney.
That's what it's all about, isn't it? 'How it can get a piece' is a perfect, one sentence representation of the religious experience in America. That is what the whole damn three card monte is about. You take the believers money and in exchange you sell them the hope that they will eventually find the red lady, and then all their sacrifice will be repaid ten fold. Just like a raggedy hustler on the street, all the mass and retreats and pilgrimages will leave you poorer with nothing tangible to show for it.
Here's the deal though. People are just fine with it. You know why?
Faith.
I wonder if the person who came up with the concept of faith realized that they had invented the perfect product. You can never have too much of it, and if someone questions it, you can berate them for not having enough of it. Millions of people go to church weekly, like drones when recalled by the mothership, and leave poorer in reality but 'richer in spirit,' whatever the hell that means.
Expoiting the faithful's finances is the only real use I have for them, which is something that I have in common with religious leaders everywhere.
By the way, if Nebraska wants a 'piece' of the pilgrimage industry, somebody should start sifting through boxes of Wheaties looking for Jesus' face, because I cannot FATHOM what in the hell is going to draw the religious to the Cornhusker state. I'm from Nebraska, I love Nebraska, but it has about as much religious relevence as... well... anywhere else in America. Maybe the state should build one of those ricockulous creationism museums with depictions of people riding dinosaurs.
In other 'People Practically Begging to get Ripped Off' news...
SIOUX FALLS, S.D. (AP) - Officials of groups that serve the deaf
say they're concerned the South Dakota Legislature has made two
withdrawals totaling $2 million the last two years from a special
fund that provides telephone services to the deaf and hearing
impaired.
South Dakotans pay 15 cents per phone line each month into the
fund, which started in 1989.
But lawmakers raided the fund at the request of Governor Rounds'
administration. The transfers are not illegal -- but they did take
earmarked money and put it into the state general fund.
Those who advocate for the deaf say the money could have been
spent on services and access. They also say a new federal mandate
requiring state relay systems for the deaf to include video relay
service will be expensive when and if it happens.
State Senator Jerry Apa (AY'-puh) of Lead (LEED), who chairs the
Appropriations Committee, says the fund had accumulated an
"excessive amount" of money and that the argument to put some of
it into the general fund was plausible.
Deaf people think they're so cool, with their secret hand language and their 'Muffaw muffaw muffaw' speech. It's like, 'Jesus, Helen Keller, like, nobody can understand you when you talk. It doesn't matter to you because you can't, like, hear how stupid you sound. Just, like, write it down or something.'
Screw the deaf. Take their phone money. I have no idea how phones for deaf people work, anyway.
This reminds me of a story I heard a LONG time ago. It was right after the Lion King came out in theaters. Jeremy Irons, the voice of Scar, was brought in to read to deaf people. Here's a write up I just culled from the Google
A number of publications, including the New York Daily News and Time, carried a story about the apparent refusal of actor Jeremy Irons to accommodate deaf members of the audience at a reading of Lolita at 40. Irons is quoted in both publications as saying, "Why would deaf people attend a reading? It's like a blind person wanting to attend a ballet." Hands On Theatre, the New York theater company that arranged for sign language interpretation of Irons' reading, reports further in its most recent newsletter that prior to the scheduled performance, Irons made a number of disparaging comments to the interpreter, Beth Prevor.
Writes Prevor, "While placement of the interpreter became an issue with Mr. Irons, much of the problem stemmed from rude and insulting comments Irons made to me, Beth Prevor, prior to the performance." According to the article, Irons said to Prevor, "Interpreting this event is ludicrous. . .why would deaf people attend a reading. . .it's like a blind person wanting to attend the ballet. . .it's ridiculous. . .why should 290 people be distracted for the sake of 10...just to give them scripts and a flashlight...this majority guilt for the sake of the minority is taking political correctness to the extreme. . .I might as well be able to bring my dog here!"
Why WOULD deaf people attend a reading? This reminds of the time I was stuck behind a group of blind people waiting to go to the top of the Empire State Building. What in the hell for? Just skip it, tell your friends that you did it anyway, and save yourself and the other 4000 people in line the goddamned time.
Wednesday, October 1, 2008
Stop Having Children!
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/24537885/
There are a lot of people in America who are worried that the population of hispanics in America will soon surpass that of decent, hard working, tax paying, god fearing white people due to the propensity of Mexican American (let's be honest here, illegal immigrant) families to be very large.
Enter the Duggars, valiant defenders of the white throne. They have 17 kids. Yes, 17 kids. They have number 18 on the way. Let's see you beat THAT, Javier!
The difference is, the Duggars are rich. They have to be. They own nine vehicles, including a 21 seat bus. They own a row of industrial size washers and dryers. They have an enormous home. I will say with only a hint of racism that 300 illegals could live in their house. I've seen pictures and it's more like a dormitory than a home.
The Duggars believe that every child is a gift from God and they will keep having them as long as they can.
I don't even know where to begin with this....
I don't even know 20 people. How can you be in a family that huge and even remember everybody's name, let alone anything about that person?
Also, what must the mother's vagina look like? You could roll a bowling ball up there and she wouldn't even notice, I'd bet.
Bottom line, stop having kids, even if you can afford it. It's disturbing, and if one of you kicks the bucket you could end up like these sad fuckers...
OMAHA, Neb. (AP) - Seven of nine children abandoned by their
father at an Omaha hospital last week under the state's safe-haven
law are headed back to foster care.
Juvenile Court Judge Elizabeth Crnkovich (SIR-koh-vitch) of
Douglas County ruled Wednesday the relative given temporary custody
is not properly set up to care for the children. Some are sharing
beds while others sleep on air mattresses.
The judge says the ruling will give the relatives time to better
prepare for the children.
The case is continued for a week to give the state time to
notify the father.
The children range in age from 1 to 17.
An aunt had stepped forward to take in seven of the children.
The two oldest children chose to go to another home to avoid
changing schools.
The guy abandoned his kids because his wife died and he couldn't take care of his kids with her gone. It's actually a very sad story. However, since he's essentially called a mulligan on this family, he better not meet someone else and start up another one. Otherwise, the state should be able to cut his nads off in public.
There are a lot of people in America who are worried that the population of hispanics in America will soon surpass that of decent, hard working, tax paying, god fearing white people due to the propensity of Mexican American (let's be honest here, illegal immigrant) families to be very large.
Enter the Duggars, valiant defenders of the white throne. They have 17 kids. Yes, 17 kids. They have number 18 on the way. Let's see you beat THAT, Javier!
The difference is, the Duggars are rich. They have to be. They own nine vehicles, including a 21 seat bus. They own a row of industrial size washers and dryers. They have an enormous home. I will say with only a hint of racism that 300 illegals could live in their house. I've seen pictures and it's more like a dormitory than a home.
The Duggars believe that every child is a gift from God and they will keep having them as long as they can.
I don't even know where to begin with this....
I don't even know 20 people. How can you be in a family that huge and even remember everybody's name, let alone anything about that person?
Also, what must the mother's vagina look like? You could roll a bowling ball up there and she wouldn't even notice, I'd bet.
Bottom line, stop having kids, even if you can afford it. It's disturbing, and if one of you kicks the bucket you could end up like these sad fuckers...
OMAHA, Neb. (AP) - Seven of nine children abandoned by their
father at an Omaha hospital last week under the state's safe-haven
law are headed back to foster care.
Juvenile Court Judge Elizabeth Crnkovich (SIR-koh-vitch) of
Douglas County ruled Wednesday the relative given temporary custody
is not properly set up to care for the children. Some are sharing
beds while others sleep on air mattresses.
The judge says the ruling will give the relatives time to better
prepare for the children.
The case is continued for a week to give the state time to
notify the father.
The children range in age from 1 to 17.
An aunt had stepped forward to take in seven of the children.
The two oldest children chose to go to another home to avoid
changing schools.
The guy abandoned his kids because his wife died and he couldn't take care of his kids with her gone. It's actually a very sad story. However, since he's essentially called a mulligan on this family, he better not meet someone else and start up another one. Otherwise, the state should be able to cut his nads off in public.
Ron Gardenhire- I Would Have Your Babies, 'Junior' Style
Sorry to the sports disinclined. Today's entry is about the one and true love of my life, baseball.
...
You have to give it to Joe Maddon. The culture of losing in Tampa was practically woven into the uniforms, practically a built into the roof of the ridiculous stadium they play in, practically smeared on the hot dogs served at the games. They had never failed to lose at least 90 games in a season. To describe the (D)Rays as doormats in the AL East for the entirety of their history is probably unfairly disparaging the good name of doormats. Yet, in 2008 the Tampa Bay Rays won the American League East. They did it by refusing to fold down the stretch despite going toe to toe with the defending World Series champs, the Boston Red Sox . The Rays also beat out the Yankees, who have a payroll larger than a third world nation's yearly budget, and the Toronto Blue Jays, a team that had legitimate playoff aspirations before the season and began to play like it under Cito Gaston.
How good was the East? Toronto finished fourth and lost one game to the White Sox and Twins... combined.
I suppose you could say that all Joe Maddon did was win with one of the most talented teams in the American League. That's true. Picking at the top of the draft for the past ten years has created a glut of young talent in Tampa.
Still, those kids didn't have any idea what it's like to win. They hadn't been involved in a September scrap with a team like the Red Sox.
What does all that mean? It means Joe Maddon ought to be the 2008 American League Manager of the Year, hands down.
Unfortunately, that means that Ron Gardenhire is once again on the outside looking in. That is a real shame. It is my belief that this season represents the best work of Gardy's career.
I was fully expecting the Twins to be bad this year. I had prepared myself for them to be REALLY bad, like 70 wins bad. I wasn't sure they'd sink quite that low, but, I was prepared for it to happen. THEN, after the season started...
- Delmon Young failed to mature into the star the Twins no doubt were hoping for when they acquired him. He finished the season better than he started it, but, all in all, he was a disappointment.
- Michael Cuddyer, inked in the off-season to a nice extension, struggled to stay on the field and was ineffective when he was out there.
- Pat Neshek was lost for the season, Matt Guerrier remembered he is Matt Guerrier, Juan Rincon's never ending melt down finally came to a climax, Boof Bonser lost his spot in the rotation and struggled in the bullpen as well, and some guy named Brian Bass ended up logging entirely too many appearances. The bullpen was a disaster. Even Joe Nathan, who seemed invincible most of the year, sputtered down the stretch, most notably on that hellish road trip foisted on the Twins late in the season by the RNC.
- Livan Hernadez started out strong before he started pitching like a fat man with a rubber arm. Which he is.
- Carlos Gomez proved two things: he is a frighteningly talented athlete, and he is not even close to being a baseball player.
- The left side of the infield was an absolute cartoon. Not a funny cartoon, either. It was more like 'Family Circle.' Howie Clark was starting at third base briefly. Howie. Clark.
That's just what leaps to the top of my head. If you had told me, going into the season, that not just one, but ALL, of these things would happen, I would have thought that perhaps 70 wins was being generous.
Yet, the Twins won 88 games and were one game away from the postseason. Amazing. Credit is due to shockingly effective young starters, Joe Mauer and Justin Morneau (both of whom deserve serious MVP consideration), and the coaching staff.
Going back to 2002, Gardenhire has built a stronger resume of doing more with less than any other manager in the league. It's not even close. Name one other manager who even deserves to be mentioned in the same breath when it comes to getting blood from a stone.
The Twins win. They win despite being saddled with an uninspired fan base, terrible facilities, a farm system short on positional prospects, and ownership that is, to say it nicely, among the worst in sports. The players change, but Gardenhire stays the same.
I'm sure that there would be a strong inclination to say that the best manager this decade has been Terry Francona, and that has merit. He has won two titles and it's not like the decade is over yet.
Let me ask you this... if you were starting a franchise, and could pick anyone to be your manager, who would you pick?
I'd pick Gardy.
...
You have to give it to Joe Maddon. The culture of losing in Tampa was practically woven into the uniforms, practically a built into the roof of the ridiculous stadium they play in, practically smeared on the hot dogs served at the games. They had never failed to lose at least 90 games in a season. To describe the (D)Rays as doormats in the AL East for the entirety of their history is probably unfairly disparaging the good name of doormats. Yet, in 2008 the Tampa Bay Rays won the American League East. They did it by refusing to fold down the stretch despite going toe to toe with the defending World Series champs, the Boston Red Sox . The Rays also beat out the Yankees, who have a payroll larger than a third world nation's yearly budget, and the Toronto Blue Jays, a team that had legitimate playoff aspirations before the season and began to play like it under Cito Gaston.
How good was the East? Toronto finished fourth and lost one game to the White Sox and Twins... combined.
I suppose you could say that all Joe Maddon did was win with one of the most talented teams in the American League. That's true. Picking at the top of the draft for the past ten years has created a glut of young talent in Tampa.
Still, those kids didn't have any idea what it's like to win. They hadn't been involved in a September scrap with a team like the Red Sox.
What does all that mean? It means Joe Maddon ought to be the 2008 American League Manager of the Year, hands down.
Unfortunately, that means that Ron Gardenhire is once again on the outside looking in. That is a real shame. It is my belief that this season represents the best work of Gardy's career.
I was fully expecting the Twins to be bad this year. I had prepared myself for them to be REALLY bad, like 70 wins bad. I wasn't sure they'd sink quite that low, but, I was prepared for it to happen. THEN, after the season started...
- Delmon Young failed to mature into the star the Twins no doubt were hoping for when they acquired him. He finished the season better than he started it, but, all in all, he was a disappointment.
- Michael Cuddyer, inked in the off-season to a nice extension, struggled to stay on the field and was ineffective when he was out there.
- Pat Neshek was lost for the season, Matt Guerrier remembered he is Matt Guerrier, Juan Rincon's never ending melt down finally came to a climax, Boof Bonser lost his spot in the rotation and struggled in the bullpen as well, and some guy named Brian Bass ended up logging entirely too many appearances. The bullpen was a disaster. Even Joe Nathan, who seemed invincible most of the year, sputtered down the stretch, most notably on that hellish road trip foisted on the Twins late in the season by the RNC.
- Livan Hernadez started out strong before he started pitching like a fat man with a rubber arm. Which he is.
- Carlos Gomez proved two things: he is a frighteningly talented athlete, and he is not even close to being a baseball player.
- The left side of the infield was an absolute cartoon. Not a funny cartoon, either. It was more like 'Family Circle.' Howie Clark was starting at third base briefly. Howie. Clark.
That's just what leaps to the top of my head. If you had told me, going into the season, that not just one, but ALL, of these things would happen, I would have thought that perhaps 70 wins was being generous.
Yet, the Twins won 88 games and were one game away from the postseason. Amazing. Credit is due to shockingly effective young starters, Joe Mauer and Justin Morneau (both of whom deserve serious MVP consideration), and the coaching staff.
Going back to 2002, Gardenhire has built a stronger resume of doing more with less than any other manager in the league. It's not even close. Name one other manager who even deserves to be mentioned in the same breath when it comes to getting blood from a stone.
The Twins win. They win despite being saddled with an uninspired fan base, terrible facilities, a farm system short on positional prospects, and ownership that is, to say it nicely, among the worst in sports. The players change, but Gardenhire stays the same.
I'm sure that there would be a strong inclination to say that the best manager this decade has been Terry Francona, and that has merit. He has won two titles and it's not like the decade is over yet.
Let me ask you this... if you were starting a franchise, and could pick anyone to be your manager, who would you pick?
I'd pick Gardy.
Tuesday, September 30, 2008
How Long are We Going to Keep Doing This?
Nice story about some Nebraska Volunteers who are coming back from Louisiana
LINCOLN, Neb. (AP) - Nebraska state workers who went to
Louisiana to help hurricane victims are headed for home.
The 12 Nebraska Department of Health and Human Services workers
left Nebraska on Sept. 12 and had been slated to return Sept. 22.
But they stayed an extra week to continue their relief efforts.
Louisiana is picking up the costs.
The Nebraska staffers have worked on the federal disaster food
stamp program, mostly recently this summer after several Nebraska
communities were hit by storms.
The U.S. Department of Agriculture provided more than $11
million worth of disaster benefits for food in Nebraska after state
officials approved aid for more than 23,500 households statewide.
It used to be a big deal, a rare occurance, when a hurricane would cause enormous amounts of damage. Hugo was a bad one. So was Andrew. Those are two past storms that I can recall off the top of my head.
These days, it's like the gulf coast gets destroyed every single year. 2005 was a complete cluster eff even BEFORE Katrina rolled in and destroyed a major American city.
How long before people admit that it was a stupid idea to build towns and cities below sea level on the coast, pull up stakes, and get the hell out of there?
Bad weather is everywhere, yeah, I know. THIS however has become a regular occurance.
MOVE you dumbshits. MOVE.
LINCOLN, Neb. (AP) - Nebraska state workers who went to
Louisiana to help hurricane victims are headed for home.
The 12 Nebraska Department of Health and Human Services workers
left Nebraska on Sept. 12 and had been slated to return Sept. 22.
But they stayed an extra week to continue their relief efforts.
Louisiana is picking up the costs.
The Nebraska staffers have worked on the federal disaster food
stamp program, mostly recently this summer after several Nebraska
communities were hit by storms.
The U.S. Department of Agriculture provided more than $11
million worth of disaster benefits for food in Nebraska after state
officials approved aid for more than 23,500 households statewide.
It used to be a big deal, a rare occurance, when a hurricane would cause enormous amounts of damage. Hugo was a bad one. So was Andrew. Those are two past storms that I can recall off the top of my head.
These days, it's like the gulf coast gets destroyed every single year. 2005 was a complete cluster eff even BEFORE Katrina rolled in and destroyed a major American city.
How long before people admit that it was a stupid idea to build towns and cities below sea level on the coast, pull up stakes, and get the hell out of there?
Bad weather is everywhere, yeah, I know. THIS however has become a regular occurance.
MOVE you dumbshits. MOVE.
Good News! You Can Rape All The Sheep You Want in Michigan and you Don't Have to Register as a Sex Offender!
http://www.freep.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20080925/NEWS03/809250421/1005
In what will surely be hailed as a monumentous victory for sheep rapers everywhere, one Jeffrey Scott Haynes, aged 45 of Michigan, will not have to register as a sex offender upon his release after serving his term for sexually assaulting a sheep. The judge ruled that animals cannot be the victims of sexual assault, therefore, Haynes is not a sex offender.
He is just a sheep raper.
This is a crushing blow to the livestock in this area, who were no doubt silently praying for SOME manner of legal precedent to be set in this regard.
This reminds me of one of the few times Jay Leno has made me laugh. He wondered aloud how people who engage in this behavior go about picking which animal they will assault. "Not that one, not that one... THIS ONE."
How'd you like to be the one to find someone doing the hibbidy dibbidy with livestock? I think you would picture it every time you closed your eyes.
Then, of course, there's a line from the classic 'Super Troopers.'
"Hey... Bear fucker! Do you need assistance?"
In what will surely be hailed as a monumentous victory for sheep rapers everywhere, one Jeffrey Scott Haynes, aged 45 of Michigan, will not have to register as a sex offender upon his release after serving his term for sexually assaulting a sheep. The judge ruled that animals cannot be the victims of sexual assault, therefore, Haynes is not a sex offender.
He is just a sheep raper.
This is a crushing blow to the livestock in this area, who were no doubt silently praying for SOME manner of legal precedent to be set in this regard.
This reminds me of one of the few times Jay Leno has made me laugh. He wondered aloud how people who engage in this behavior go about picking which animal they will assault. "Not that one, not that one... THIS ONE."
How'd you like to be the one to find someone doing the hibbidy dibbidy with livestock? I think you would picture it every time you closed your eyes.
Then, of course, there's a line from the classic 'Super Troopers.'
"Hey... Bear fucker! Do you need assistance?"
Design a Baby: It's Like Sim-City, Only Instead of a Computer City, It's a Real Baby
America is a consumer driven society, and soon, the ultimate accessory will be available...
CUSTOM DESIGNED BABIES.
http://articles.moneycentral.msn.com/Investing/HomeMortgageSavings/designing-the-100000-baby.aspx
Want your kid to have blue eyes and blond hair? Done. Want junior to be cancer resistant? Okeedokey. Want the kid to be a jock? Can do.
It's amazing stuff, and it's not that far off. Already they are holding expos where vendors set up brightly colored booths and hawk 'cutting-edge baby making technology' which, incidentally, is the copyright protected name I have given my penis. HA! I wrote this post just to make that joke.
Once this stuff becomes reality the religious right will shit, and part of me is inclined to agree with them. This is frightening stuff. Kids with price tags? I don't suppose anyone here has seen Gattica?
On the other hand, there are some breathtakingly ugly children in this particular area of Souf Central Souf Dakota. I mean, it's tough to look at them. So, maybe made to order babies aren't such a bad idea.
CUSTOM DESIGNED BABIES.
http://articles.moneycentral.msn.com/Investing/HomeMortgageSavings/designing-the-100000-baby.aspx
Want your kid to have blue eyes and blond hair? Done. Want junior to be cancer resistant? Okeedokey. Want the kid to be a jock? Can do.
It's amazing stuff, and it's not that far off. Already they are holding expos where vendors set up brightly colored booths and hawk 'cutting-edge baby making technology' which, incidentally, is the copyright protected name I have given my penis. HA! I wrote this post just to make that joke.
Once this stuff becomes reality the religious right will shit, and part of me is inclined to agree with them. This is frightening stuff. Kids with price tags? I don't suppose anyone here has seen Gattica?
On the other hand, there are some breathtakingly ugly children in this particular area of Souf Central Souf Dakota. I mean, it's tough to look at them. So, maybe made to order babies aren't such a bad idea.
Monday, September 29, 2008
Where the Hell Were These Teachers When I was 13?
OMAHA, Neb. (AP) - A former teacher who fled to Mexico with a
13-year-old former student has gotten six years in federal prison.
In U.S. District Court on Monday, Kelsey Peterson also was
sentenced to five years of supervised release after she leaves
prison.
The 26-year-old pleaded guilty in July.
Peterson was the boy's sixth-grade math teacher at Lexington
Middle School during the 2005-2006 school year. She started having
sex with him in November 2006.
The pair disappeared in October, soon after the district's
superintendent confronted Peterson about allegations of an
inappropriate relationship with the boy, then 13.
She was arrested a week later in Mexicali, Mexico, after the boy
made a cell phone call to his family.
One of the most bizarre phenomenen (phenomenons?) in America is the sexy blonde teacher diddling the 12 year old kid with the mustache that she teaches fingerpainting to during school hours.
Why doesn't the word pedophile get thrown around when it comes to these women? Clearly, they are diseased mentally. It's not natural to want to bone your 13 year old student. Still, you never hear them referred to as pedophiles.
I'm probably just jealous. I was probably the most sexually frustrated teenager in the history of sexually frustrated teenagers. I ask again, where the hell were these women when I was in 6th grade?
13-year-old former student has gotten six years in federal prison.
In U.S. District Court on Monday, Kelsey Peterson also was
sentenced to five years of supervised release after she leaves
prison.
The 26-year-old pleaded guilty in July.
Peterson was the boy's sixth-grade math teacher at Lexington
Middle School during the 2005-2006 school year. She started having
sex with him in November 2006.
The pair disappeared in October, soon after the district's
superintendent confronted Peterson about allegations of an
inappropriate relationship with the boy, then 13.
She was arrested a week later in Mexicali, Mexico, after the boy
made a cell phone call to his family.
One of the most bizarre phenomenen (phenomenons?) in America is the sexy blonde teacher diddling the 12 year old kid with the mustache that she teaches fingerpainting to during school hours.
Why doesn't the word pedophile get thrown around when it comes to these women? Clearly, they are diseased mentally. It's not natural to want to bone your 13 year old student. Still, you never hear them referred to as pedophiles.
I'm probably just jealous. I was probably the most sexually frustrated teenager in the history of sexually frustrated teenagers. I ask again, where the hell were these women when I was in 6th grade?
JUST HOLD ON NOW... How good of a boob job are we talking about here?
http://www.engadget.com/2007/11/05/boy-hires-hitman-to-kill-parents-after-being-denied-playstation/
http://www.myfoxcolorado.com/myfox/pages/Home/Detail?contentId=7526256&version=2&locale=EN-US&layoutCode=TSTY&pageId=1.1.1
Kids these days. The first link goes to a story from late last year that the story on the second link reminded me of.
Story #1: A boy who had been grounded from his Playstation tried to hire an undercover cop to kill his parents. What's truly great about this is that the kid had been threatening to have his parents killed, and his parents are the ones who set him up with the undercover cop. Now the kids facing attempted murder. 2 things
1. How was he dropping these hints around the house? Here's my guess.
Mom: How was school, Lil Billy?
Lil Billy: It was fine.
Mom: What did you learn?
Lil Billy: I learned I'm going to hire a hitman to kill you.
Mom: What?
Lil Billy: Nothing.
2. Where would a cop posing as a hitman go to approach a 16 year kid? How was the initial meeting arranged? This kid must be a total dipshit. Now, I'm not here to tell people what to do and what not to do. If you want to kill your parents, I don't give a shit. Do it, then. Quit talking about it and do it. However, allow me to at least offer this advice. If you've been threatening to hire someone to kill your parents and suddenly, out of the blue, a hitman approaches you at Taco Bell, perhaps, you should look elsewhere, as he is probably a cop sent by your parents to trick your ignorant ignorant ass into committing a felony.
His big plan was to give the hitter his father's truck as payment for the dirty deed.
I only mention this story because a new one today reminded me of it. Let's move on...
Story #2: A Colorado teen engaged two other teenaged rocket scientists to beat his mother to death with a baseball bat. Fine. As I said, that doesn't bother me. Just leave my parents alone. I don't care what you do to yours.
Here's what makes this notable... one is the fact that the two dunces hired to kill Mom did indeed beat her with a bat. She didn't die though. Is there anything worse than a half ass hit? COME ON.
The other notable aspect of this story is the reason behind the attack. The boy, Nikita Lee Weis, wanted his mom dead so he could drain her checking account and sell her car to pay for a new pair of tittays for his 21 year old girlfriend, one Sophia Nicole Alsept.
I think the obvious question here is, how nice were the new boobies going to be? Another obvious one is, how bad are her boobies currently? Obviously it was a situation worth killing over. Incidentally Sophia slightly resembles a girl I went to high school with. That girl already had nice boobs though. Luckily.
One final thought. I think the mom had this coming, if only for naming her son 'Nikita.' Something to bear in mind the next time you are inclined to give your child a stupid name.
http://www.myfoxcolorado.com/myfox/pages/Home/Detail?contentId=7526256&version=2&locale=EN-US&layoutCode=TSTY&pageId=1.1.1
Kids these days. The first link goes to a story from late last year that the story on the second link reminded me of.
Story #1: A boy who had been grounded from his Playstation tried to hire an undercover cop to kill his parents. What's truly great about this is that the kid had been threatening to have his parents killed, and his parents are the ones who set him up with the undercover cop. Now the kids facing attempted murder. 2 things
1. How was he dropping these hints around the house? Here's my guess.
Mom: How was school, Lil Billy?
Lil Billy: It was fine.
Mom: What did you learn?
Lil Billy: I learned I'm going to hire a hitman to kill you.
Mom: What?
Lil Billy: Nothing.
2. Where would a cop posing as a hitman go to approach a 16 year kid? How was the initial meeting arranged? This kid must be a total dipshit. Now, I'm not here to tell people what to do and what not to do. If you want to kill your parents, I don't give a shit. Do it, then. Quit talking about it and do it. However, allow me to at least offer this advice. If you've been threatening to hire someone to kill your parents and suddenly, out of the blue, a hitman approaches you at Taco Bell, perhaps, you should look elsewhere, as he is probably a cop sent by your parents to trick your ignorant ignorant ass into committing a felony.
His big plan was to give the hitter his father's truck as payment for the dirty deed.
I only mention this story because a new one today reminded me of it. Let's move on...
Story #2: A Colorado teen engaged two other teenaged rocket scientists to beat his mother to death with a baseball bat. Fine. As I said, that doesn't bother me. Just leave my parents alone. I don't care what you do to yours.
Here's what makes this notable... one is the fact that the two dunces hired to kill Mom did indeed beat her with a bat. She didn't die though. Is there anything worse than a half ass hit? COME ON.
The other notable aspect of this story is the reason behind the attack. The boy, Nikita Lee Weis, wanted his mom dead so he could drain her checking account and sell her car to pay for a new pair of tittays for his 21 year old girlfriend, one Sophia Nicole Alsept.
I think the obvious question here is, how nice were the new boobies going to be? Another obvious one is, how bad are her boobies currently? Obviously it was a situation worth killing over. Incidentally Sophia slightly resembles a girl I went to high school with. That girl already had nice boobs though. Luckily.
One final thought. I think the mom had this coming, if only for naming her son 'Nikita.' Something to bear in mind the next time you are inclined to give your child a stupid name.
Wednesday, September 24, 2008
I'm an Internet Minister
I was reminded in a roundabout way tonight that I am an ordained Internet Minister. I earned this serious, life changing designation one day during web design class. I was bored with playing 'Bejeweled.'
The problem is I often go months at a time forgetting that I have these Holy Jesus powers. Then, I'll remember and go on a week long tear of blessing people's beers against their will and speaking in religious tones.
Maybe tonight I'll make my way down to one of the fine drinking establishments and threaten to declare a couple of homophobes to be married in the eyes of the internet Lord.
OR
I could claim that since the Black Hills were taken illegally, this isn't America at all, and then I'll say, "I now pronounce you man and also man."
And they'll say, "This isn't the Black Hills, though."
And I'll say, "Shut up queers. Get the hell out of America."
I think any one reading this should check out this site.
www.sexwithtimaree.com
It's an old friend of mine who writes the most entertaining columns about doing the nasty I've ever seen.
The problem is I often go months at a time forgetting that I have these Holy Jesus powers. Then, I'll remember and go on a week long tear of blessing people's beers against their will and speaking in religious tones.
Maybe tonight I'll make my way down to one of the fine drinking establishments and threaten to declare a couple of homophobes to be married in the eyes of the internet Lord.
OR
I could claim that since the Black Hills were taken illegally, this isn't America at all, and then I'll say, "I now pronounce you man and also man."
And they'll say, "This isn't the Black Hills, though."
And I'll say, "Shut up queers. Get the hell out of America."
I think any one reading this should check out this site.
www.sexwithtimaree.com
It's an old friend of mine who writes the most entertaining columns about doing the nasty I've ever seen.
Tuesday, September 23, 2008
Don't Buy Locally... Let Them Die
I like to think that the Dispatch is a legitimate web publication. I don't like the word 'blog.' I don't think it fits. I'm not posting photographs of my cat and the outfits I dress it in. I'm not talking about my vacation or my day or anything.
The way it works is, I go out and find the weird stuff, bring it back, and post the link or the AP story. Then I comment on it in a humorous manner. That's how it works.
Today, however, I dare to venture into the 'blog' or 'web diary' territory. My justification is that this story illustrates what it's like here, in the butt crack of America that is Souf Dakota.
I've made some terrible decisions as a consumer. I paid 50 grand for a degree that isn't worth the paper it's printed on. I paid $2500 for a lap top that probably wasn't worth $500. I bought an X-Box 360 that quit working properly less than a month after I took it out of the box.
Even given all that, I would argue that the worst consumer decision I've made in a long time was choosing to shop locally. I made the mistake of ordering a new phone charger from a local All-Tel dealer. Never mind that the phone is less than a year old and they should have had a charger here already for me to walk in and purchase. So, whatever, order one for me then.
That was August.
In the amount of time it's taken to get here I have been to North Platte twice. North Platte Nebraska is a desperately boring and trashy town but just off the top of my head I can think of 4 places I could have purchased a new phone charger. In the amount of time it's taken the Pony Express to get it here, I could have walked to China and gotten one directly from the factory. IN THE TIME IT HAS TAKEN FOR THE GODDAMN CHARGER TO GET HERE I COULD HAVE MADE ONE OUT OF A LEMON AND A PENNY FOR SHIT'S SAKE
http://hilaroad.com/camp/projects/lemon/lemon_battery.html
The moral of the story is, don't shop locally. The ladies have certainly been kind when apologizing when I ask them about the charger. Frankly, I would rather be disrespected by a zit faced teenager at Wal Mart for 2 minutes and walk out with the goddamn charger in my hand.
"Personal service" is overrated. They don't really treat you any better at these small local shops anyway. It's a myth. It's certainly not worth the extra money and time it will take.
Do your Christmas shopping at Wal Mart and let small town America fade away for good.
The way it works is, I go out and find the weird stuff, bring it back, and post the link or the AP story. Then I comment on it in a humorous manner. That's how it works.
Today, however, I dare to venture into the 'blog' or 'web diary' territory. My justification is that this story illustrates what it's like here, in the butt crack of America that is Souf Dakota.
I've made some terrible decisions as a consumer. I paid 50 grand for a degree that isn't worth the paper it's printed on. I paid $2500 for a lap top that probably wasn't worth $500. I bought an X-Box 360 that quit working properly less than a month after I took it out of the box.
Even given all that, I would argue that the worst consumer decision I've made in a long time was choosing to shop locally. I made the mistake of ordering a new phone charger from a local All-Tel dealer. Never mind that the phone is less than a year old and they should have had a charger here already for me to walk in and purchase. So, whatever, order one for me then.
That was August.
In the amount of time it's taken to get here I have been to North Platte twice. North Platte Nebraska is a desperately boring and trashy town but just off the top of my head I can think of 4 places I could have purchased a new phone charger. In the amount of time it's taken the Pony Express to get it here, I could have walked to China and gotten one directly from the factory. IN THE TIME IT HAS TAKEN FOR THE GODDAMN CHARGER TO GET HERE I COULD HAVE MADE ONE OUT OF A LEMON AND A PENNY FOR SHIT'S SAKE
http://hilaroad.com/camp/projects/lemon/lemon_battery.html
The moral of the story is, don't shop locally. The ladies have certainly been kind when apologizing when I ask them about the charger. Frankly, I would rather be disrespected by a zit faced teenager at Wal Mart for 2 minutes and walk out with the goddamn charger in my hand.
"Personal service" is overrated. They don't really treat you any better at these small local shops anyway. It's a myth. It's certainly not worth the extra money and time it will take.
Do your Christmas shopping at Wal Mart and let small town America fade away for good.
Monday, September 22, 2008
Merry Christmas! What Did I Get You? I Killed Your Mom and Your Aunt! Their Bodies Are In the Basement! Plus, I'm Going to Rape You Now!
OMAHA, Neb. (AP) - A 47-year-old Omaha man has been sentenced to
two life sentences in prison for killing his girlfriend and her
sister.
Fabian Hands pleaded guilty in July to two counts of
first-degree murder and weapons charges in the stabbing deaths of
36-year-old Saundra Brown and 48-year-old Renota Brown. Their
bodies were found Christmas Eve last year in the basement of a
north Omaha house.
Hands also pleaded guilty to first-degree sexual assault for an
attack on the adult daughter of one of the victims. Police say she
ran from a bedroom of the house begging for help when officers
arrived at the house on Christmas Eve. Officers later discovered
the bodies of her mother and aunt in the basement.
Prosecutors agreed not to seek the death penalty for Hands in
exchange for his guilty pleas.
I've had had some rough Christmas holidays in my life. One whole side of my family has never liked me and that has led to some awkward, awkward days.
Still, in retrospect, I guess it could have been worse. Having to play marbles for the 2000th time kinda pales when compared to being butchered and stashed in the basement.
!BONUS!
A Sarah Palin sighting in Omaha!
OMAHA, Neb. (AP) - Nebraska Humane Society officials have seized
a pit bull accused of attacking a man on an Omaha city street this
weekend.
Officials say the dog was taken Sunday afternoon after it
attacked a man in northeast Omaha.
Officials say the dog was not licensed and they found no record
of current vaccinations.
The dog was tracked down after the man sought treatment for a
bite to his stomach.
A recent rash of attacks and confrontations involving pit bulls
has led Omaha officials to consider strengthening city ordinances
dealing with the breed and dogs considered to be dangerous.
two life sentences in prison for killing his girlfriend and her
sister.
Fabian Hands pleaded guilty in July to two counts of
first-degree murder and weapons charges in the stabbing deaths of
36-year-old Saundra Brown and 48-year-old Renota Brown. Their
bodies were found Christmas Eve last year in the basement of a
north Omaha house.
Hands also pleaded guilty to first-degree sexual assault for an
attack on the adult daughter of one of the victims. Police say she
ran from a bedroom of the house begging for help when officers
arrived at the house on Christmas Eve. Officers later discovered
the bodies of her mother and aunt in the basement.
Prosecutors agreed not to seek the death penalty for Hands in
exchange for his guilty pleas.
I've had had some rough Christmas holidays in my life. One whole side of my family has never liked me and that has led to some awkward, awkward days.
Still, in retrospect, I guess it could have been worse. Having to play marbles for the 2000th time kinda pales when compared to being butchered and stashed in the basement.
!BONUS!
A Sarah Palin sighting in Omaha!
OMAHA, Neb. (AP) - Nebraska Humane Society officials have seized
a pit bull accused of attacking a man on an Omaha city street this
weekend.
Officials say the dog was taken Sunday afternoon after it
attacked a man in northeast Omaha.
Officials say the dog was not licensed and they found no record
of current vaccinations.
The dog was tracked down after the man sought treatment for a
bite to his stomach.
A recent rash of attacks and confrontations involving pit bulls
has led Omaha officials to consider strengthening city ordinances
dealing with the breed and dogs considered to be dangerous.
Lipstick is SO HARD to clean out of a gaping stomach wound.
The AP is an Embarrassment of Riches Today
Here are the two best so far out of what has been a good day for weird Souf Dakota and Nebraska news. Just missing the cut: Two douche bags using a dead relative's credit card to rack up 25 grand in debt, and vandals reeking havoc in the Deadwood cemetary.
PIERRE, S.D. (AP) - A 23-year-old Pierre man has received a
five-year suspended prison sentence for stealing women's underwear.
Matthew Poole also was put on probation for 3 years and must pay
$850 in restitution.
He also was ordered to get sex-offender counseling and stay away
from children, pornography and adult entertainment businesses.
Hughes County State's Attorney Kelly Marnette says Poole was
working as a deliveryman and stole the women's undergarments from
homes where he was making deliveries.
What, like YOU'VE never entered someone's home, under the pretense of making a delivery of furniture or electronics or oxygen or whatever, and stolen some panties? Like YOU'VE never done that? Fine, lie to me, yourself, God, and the entire internet.
How did they catch the guy? Did they find him with his hand in the cookie jar? Or panty jar, as it were?
Also, doesn't the sentence seem a little extreme for just being a pervert? Why can't he look at porn or go to titty bars or dildo stores? Where else is he to aqcuire the various lubes and assorted ticklers and devices that normal, healthy adults often find themselves in need of? It all seems a little Draconian to me.
SIOUX FALLS, S.D. (AP) - Sioux Falls police say a cab driver was
arrested Saturday night after telling an undercover officer that
her cab ride would be free if she let him videotape her.
Police say 45-year-old Marc Steven Trujillo (truh-HEE'-oh) faces
three charges related to his cab operation and one charge of
marijuana possession.
This past spring, Trujillo, of the cab service "ABC Deliver
Me," was arrested for soliciting prostitution and two drug
charges. The city then suspended his license to operate a cab.
In a release, police said they had gotten subsequent complaints
that Trujillo was still operating his cab service and was trying to
videotape female fares.
Marc Steven Trujillo is one of my AP-lebrities. That is, someone who pops up and their story is interesting enough for me to make mental note of the details and/or their name. Some AP-lebrities have their one, white hot moment of glory and disappear (a la Tango Crenshaw). Others pop up again, like Mr. Trujillo and the Butt Bandit.
So, this Trujillo character is a repeat offender. He first came to my attention in August, a few weeks before I started the Pheasant Dispatch. He, as a cab driver in Sioux Falls, was kind enough to offer free rides to young women. All they had to do was give him a blow job.
Amazingly, not everyone was thrilled by his proposal, and the man laid the hammer down on him. Not to be deterred, Marc Steven Trujillo persisted, as any great American should. A colleague pointed out that he probably wouldn't keep it up if it hadn't worked at least once.
So, the question is...
How did YOU enjoy your cab ride in Sioux Falls?
PIERRE, S.D. (AP) - A 23-year-old Pierre man has received a
five-year suspended prison sentence for stealing women's underwear.
Matthew Poole also was put on probation for 3 years and must pay
$850 in restitution.
He also was ordered to get sex-offender counseling and stay away
from children, pornography and adult entertainment businesses.
Hughes County State's Attorney Kelly Marnette says Poole was
working as a deliveryman and stole the women's undergarments from
homes where he was making deliveries.
What, like YOU'VE never entered someone's home, under the pretense of making a delivery of furniture or electronics or oxygen or whatever, and stolen some panties? Like YOU'VE never done that? Fine, lie to me, yourself, God, and the entire internet.
How did they catch the guy? Did they find him with his hand in the cookie jar? Or panty jar, as it were?
Also, doesn't the sentence seem a little extreme for just being a pervert? Why can't he look at porn or go to titty bars or dildo stores? Where else is he to aqcuire the various lubes and assorted ticklers and devices that normal, healthy adults often find themselves in need of? It all seems a little Draconian to me.
SIOUX FALLS, S.D. (AP) - Sioux Falls police say a cab driver was
arrested Saturday night after telling an undercover officer that
her cab ride would be free if she let him videotape her.
Police say 45-year-old Marc Steven Trujillo (truh-HEE'-oh) faces
three charges related to his cab operation and one charge of
marijuana possession.
This past spring, Trujillo, of the cab service "ABC Deliver
Me," was arrested for soliciting prostitution and two drug
charges. The city then suspended his license to operate a cab.
In a release, police said they had gotten subsequent complaints
that Trujillo was still operating his cab service and was trying to
videotape female fares.
Marc Steven Trujillo is one of my AP-lebrities. That is, someone who pops up and their story is interesting enough for me to make mental note of the details and/or their name. Some AP-lebrities have their one, white hot moment of glory and disappear (a la Tango Crenshaw). Others pop up again, like Mr. Trujillo and the Butt Bandit.
So, this Trujillo character is a repeat offender. He first came to my attention in August, a few weeks before I started the Pheasant Dispatch. He, as a cab driver in Sioux Falls, was kind enough to offer free rides to young women. All they had to do was give him a blow job.
Amazingly, not everyone was thrilled by his proposal, and the man laid the hammer down on him. Not to be deterred, Marc Steven Trujillo persisted, as any great American should. A colleague pointed out that he probably wouldn't keep it up if it hadn't worked at least once.
So, the question is...
How did YOU enjoy your cab ride in Sioux Falls?
There's a Picture of Jamie Lynn Spears' Boob Out There, and if You Want to See it You are a Pervert and a Criminal
http://www.tmz.com/2008/09/22/mommy-pics-of-brits-sis-trigger-criminal-probe/
Quick recap: Jamie Lynn Spears is Britney Spears' sister and she got knocked up at 16 (like any good republican girl) and she had a baby and her baby daddy took pictures of her doing various mommy things such as breast feeding and then he took his camara card to Wal-Mart and someone made extra copies and is trying to sell them which has opened up a can of shit that includes a federal child pornography investigation and the Spears clan contemplating filing suit against Wal-Mart. Whew!
Here's my thought on this... if your baby mama is THE single most famous unmarried teenage mother on the planet, and the child's aunt is only a few months removed from a two year train wreck public meltdown the likes of which has never been seen, and you have a picture of your baby mama's exposed breast, maybe you shouldn't take those pictures down to Darryl at the Wal-Mart to get them developed. Maybe you could have figured out a smarter way to handle that situation.
The idea of this being child pornography is, to me, ironic if not laughable. A decade ago, Aunt Britney was rocketing to international super stardom on the strength of her jail bait body and provactive dancing at the age of 16.
A co-worker and I were discussing Britney just a few minutes ago. I think she's as hot as she ever was. Then again, I have a thing for moms. He thinks she won't ever be hot again unless she gets her 16 year old rock hard body back. He is unreasonable and childish, I believe. He has these ridiculous standards. I tell him, ALL THE TIME, just have a fat girl give you head and your outlook on life will improve 100%. But NOOOOOO.
I'm sorry... what was I talking about?
Quick recap: Jamie Lynn Spears is Britney Spears' sister and she got knocked up at 16 (like any good republican girl) and she had a baby and her baby daddy took pictures of her doing various mommy things such as breast feeding and then he took his camara card to Wal-Mart and someone made extra copies and is trying to sell them which has opened up a can of shit that includes a federal child pornography investigation and the Spears clan contemplating filing suit against Wal-Mart. Whew!
Here's my thought on this... if your baby mama is THE single most famous unmarried teenage mother on the planet, and the child's aunt is only a few months removed from a two year train wreck public meltdown the likes of which has never been seen, and you have a picture of your baby mama's exposed breast, maybe you shouldn't take those pictures down to Darryl at the Wal-Mart to get them developed. Maybe you could have figured out a smarter way to handle that situation.
The idea of this being child pornography is, to me, ironic if not laughable. A decade ago, Aunt Britney was rocketing to international super stardom on the strength of her jail bait body and provactive dancing at the age of 16.
A co-worker and I were discussing Britney just a few minutes ago. I think she's as hot as she ever was. Then again, I have a thing for moms. He thinks she won't ever be hot again unless she gets her 16 year old rock hard body back. He is unreasonable and childish, I believe. He has these ridiculous standards. I tell him, ALL THE TIME, just have a fat girl give you head and your outlook on life will improve 100%. But NOOOOOO.
I'm sorry... what was I talking about?
Knock Knock... Who's There?... It's a Bum Eating Your Cheese and Sleeping in Your Child's Bed
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/26799738/?GT1=43001
Many things go bump in the night. Sometimes it's the wind. Other times it's a machete carrying hockey mask wearing psycho who wants to kill you and all those naughty teenagers what with the sex and the doobies.
Or maybe, if you live in Billings Montana (and who doesn't?) it may just be Tracy Mullins, a 47 year old man who looks eerily like Charles Manson but in reality has no more evil intentions than to eat your cheese and sleep it off in whatever bed happens to be handy.
Last Monday a woman in Billings was awoken at 8:30AM by the sound of snoring coming from her child's room. She investigated, found Mullins, woke her husband, and went to the neighbor's house to call the police. Meanwhile, her husband menaced Mullins with an unloaded shotgun, keeping him there until the police arrived.
Apparently Mullins is crazy and he has been receiving treatment. One interesting note from the story is the tid bit that he 'made a mess' in the bathroom. What exactly does that mean? Did he pee on the floor? Did he poop in the shower? Or did he just leave a towel on the floor? I hate it when they leave out the details.
The guys trial began last Thursday. I'll be hoping for an update.
Many things go bump in the night. Sometimes it's the wind. Other times it's a machete carrying hockey mask wearing psycho who wants to kill you and all those naughty teenagers what with the sex and the doobies.
Or maybe, if you live in Billings Montana (and who doesn't?) it may just be Tracy Mullins, a 47 year old man who looks eerily like Charles Manson but in reality has no more evil intentions than to eat your cheese and sleep it off in whatever bed happens to be handy.
Last Monday a woman in Billings was awoken at 8:30AM by the sound of snoring coming from her child's room. She investigated, found Mullins, woke her husband, and went to the neighbor's house to call the police. Meanwhile, her husband menaced Mullins with an unloaded shotgun, keeping him there until the police arrived.
Apparently Mullins is crazy and he has been receiving treatment. One interesting note from the story is the tid bit that he 'made a mess' in the bathroom. What exactly does that mean? Did he pee on the floor? Did he poop in the shower? Or did he just leave a towel on the floor? I hate it when they leave out the details.
The guys trial began last Thursday. I'll be hoping for an update.
Thursday, September 18, 2008
I am Mohamed Rage
OMAHA, Neb. (AP) - A dispute at a Grand Island meatpacking plant
has led to the firings or resignations of more than 60 Muslim
employees.
Local union president Dan Hoppes says between 60 and 80 Muslim
workers at the JBS Swift & Co. plant walked off the job Thursday
night. He says that happened after "getting loud" about wanting
time to pray during their shift. He says management told the
workers to go back to work or leave. They left.
But Somali leader Mohamed Rage says about 80 workers were fired
after a verbal altercation with Hispanic workers and management
over the prayer issue. Rage says a few workers have said that if
the 80 weren't rehired, more could quit Friday.
Both Hoppes and Rage say operations were normal or near normal
Friday afternoon.
Mohamed Rage is one of the best real names I've ever seen. It's up there with Tango Crenshaw, an rv driver who was charged with throwing (yeah, throwing) an ax at other motorist. Tango then produced a shovel and was menacing his victim with it when the police arrived. Tango Crenshaw and Mohamed Rage should become partners. It doesn't matter what activity they engage in, be it crime busting or tiddly winks.
In other news...
BROKEN BOW, Neb. (AP) - A 73-year-old man accused of paying a
10-year-old girl for sex has pleaded no contest to sexual assault
of a child in a deal with prosecutors.
Floyd Martin of Oconto appeared Thursday in Custer County
District Court and entered the plea.
In exchange, two other charges against him were dropped.
Court records show Martin was caught naked in bed with the girl
in June.
The girl told authorities Martin paid her $5 to have sex with
him.
Martin's sentencing is set for November. He faces up to 50 years in prison.
Yeah, I think it's funny. I'd be curious to know how old man river broached the subject to the ten year old. I'd also have liked to have been a fly on the wall when he got caught in bed with her. THAT would have been one HELL of an awkward confrontation. How did they arrive at the $5 price? Did they haggle? Will this pedophile get his ass kicked in the big house like all the other chimos? After all, he's an old man. You can't just kick an old man's asss, even if he is a pervert.
Finally...
LINCOLN, Neb. (AP) - Police say a knife-wielding man who was hit
by a Taser shot has died.
Police were called to a domestic disturbance just before 3 a.m.
Friday.
Chief Tom Casady says an officer found 23-year-old Gabriel
Bitterman holding his girlfriend at knifepoint.
Casady says the officer fired the Taser after Bitterman turned
toward the officer, still holding the knife despite the officer's
orders.
Bitterman soon stopped breathing.
The chief says Bitterman was given CPR and taken to a hospital,
where he was pronounced dead. An autopsy has been ordered.
Nothing seems out of line here. A tragic turn of events, to be sure, but I'm sure the cops had no other alternative.
Except... there's more
Casady says a crew for MTV's "Busted!" show was with the
officer and got an audio recording of the incident. The tape has
been retained as evidence.
Ooooooooooh SHIT! Perhaps the cops went a little gung ho for the camaras, maybe? Maybe I'm just being an ass. However, I'm of a mind to agree with Costigan from 'The Departed' when he said the only thing more full of shit than a cop is a cop on tv. Henry Rollins brilliantly satirizes the 'COPS' effect on police officers in the otherwise forgettable 'The Chase.' I'll be following this one.
has led to the firings or resignations of more than 60 Muslim
employees.
Local union president Dan Hoppes says between 60 and 80 Muslim
workers at the JBS Swift & Co. plant walked off the job Thursday
night. He says that happened after "getting loud" about wanting
time to pray during their shift. He says management told the
workers to go back to work or leave. They left.
But Somali leader Mohamed Rage says about 80 workers were fired
after a verbal altercation with Hispanic workers and management
over the prayer issue. Rage says a few workers have said that if
the 80 weren't rehired, more could quit Friday.
Both Hoppes and Rage say operations were normal or near normal
Friday afternoon.
Mohamed Rage is one of the best real names I've ever seen. It's up there with Tango Crenshaw, an rv driver who was charged with throwing (yeah, throwing) an ax at other motorist. Tango then produced a shovel and was menacing his victim with it when the police arrived. Tango Crenshaw and Mohamed Rage should become partners. It doesn't matter what activity they engage in, be it crime busting or tiddly winks.
In other news...
BROKEN BOW, Neb. (AP) - A 73-year-old man accused of paying a
10-year-old girl for sex has pleaded no contest to sexual assault
of a child in a deal with prosecutors.
Floyd Martin of Oconto appeared Thursday in Custer County
District Court and entered the plea.
In exchange, two other charges against him were dropped.
Court records show Martin was caught naked in bed with the girl
in June.
The girl told authorities Martin paid her $5 to have sex with
him.
Martin's sentencing is set for November. He faces up to 50 years in prison.
Yeah, I think it's funny. I'd be curious to know how old man river broached the subject to the ten year old. I'd also have liked to have been a fly on the wall when he got caught in bed with her. THAT would have been one HELL of an awkward confrontation. How did they arrive at the $5 price? Did they haggle? Will this pedophile get his ass kicked in the big house like all the other chimos? After all, he's an old man. You can't just kick an old man's asss, even if he is a pervert.
Finally...
LINCOLN, Neb. (AP) - Police say a knife-wielding man who was hit
by a Taser shot has died.
Police were called to a domestic disturbance just before 3 a.m.
Friday.
Chief Tom Casady says an officer found 23-year-old Gabriel
Bitterman holding his girlfriend at knifepoint.
Casady says the officer fired the Taser after Bitterman turned
toward the officer, still holding the knife despite the officer's
orders.
Bitterman soon stopped breathing.
The chief says Bitterman was given CPR and taken to a hospital,
where he was pronounced dead. An autopsy has been ordered.
Nothing seems out of line here. A tragic turn of events, to be sure, but I'm sure the cops had no other alternative.
Except... there's more
Casady says a crew for MTV's "Busted!" show was with the
officer and got an audio recording of the incident. The tape has
been retained as evidence.
Ooooooooooh SHIT! Perhaps the cops went a little gung ho for the camaras, maybe? Maybe I'm just being an ass. However, I'm of a mind to agree with Costigan from 'The Departed' when he said the only thing more full of shit than a cop is a cop on tv. Henry Rollins brilliantly satirizes the 'COPS' effect on police officers in the otherwise forgettable 'The Chase.' I'll be following this one.
Norman the Cat Totally Had This Coming
Today is a study in what happens when love of animals becomes violent.
http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,424486,00.html
This story was brought to the Dispatch's attention by our good friend, and to our knowledge, the only person who actually reads this blog, Tovilina.
The story is about a former athlete and current unemployed actor (if you are unemployed, couldn't you in theory be unemployed in whatever field you choose? The next time I'm 'on the beach' which is a fancy radio term for being out of work, I'm going to claim to be an unemployed astrophysicist). I thought, ok, I know the names of a lot of athletes and actors. The guy's name? Joseph Petcka.
...
...
Who the fuck is Joseph Petcka?
According to the story, he was dating an attractive and successful Sports Illustrated reporter who had a cat named Norman. Mr. Petcka was enamored with the reporter, and obsessed with earning the cat's affection. He went so far as to journal his progress with the cat. Unfortunately, Norman hated Mr. Petcka. Things culminated with Petcka getting drunk on his girlfriend's booze, threatening to microwave Norman, and eventually kicking the cat to death.
Take a deep breath. Ok. Here's the deal.
Super pretty women and cats are two things in this world that I have little use for. I don't trust them, I don't like being around them, and in the case of cats, I'm allergic to them (pretty women are in fact allergic to me. HA! Thank you! Tip your waittress). I derive a great deal of pleasure from watching beautiful women and cats get taken down a peg or two. Still, this, uh, may have been excessive.
Also, I am not a doctor, but my amateur diagnosis is that Joseph Petcka is completely insane.
In more local news...
LINCOLN, Neb. (AP) - The Lancaster County Sheriff's office found
no crime in an investigation into an alleged threat over a Hickman
horse.
Sergeant Scott Gaston said this evening that a deputy listened
to multiple messages, and that the words weren't criminal.
City Councilman Dave Dykmann says a phone message was left at
city offices Wednesday by a woman threatening to shoot him and the
mayor.
Gaston says while he can't share the message in question, it was
worded differently and the words "weren't criminal."
The person who left the messages was contacted, Gaston said, but
won't face any charges.
Here's an earlier AP story that fills in the details...
LINCOLN, Neb. (AP) - The flap over Peter Rabbit the horse has
turned deadly serious in the small Nebraska town of Hickman.
City Councilman Dave Dykmann says a woman left a phone message
at city offices on Wednesday saying "if I had a gun I'd shoot Dave
Dykmann and the mayor." The woman apparently was upset with the
council's recent decision to uphold its ban on livestock in city
limits and force the 32-year-old horse to leave the pasture where
he was born.
Peter Rabbit's 76-year-old owner, Harley Scott, has said the
horse is too old to move, and the horse remained in the pasture.
Officials have tried to ticket Scott, but Dykmann says the
family seems to have left town.
Harley Scott's son, Jack Scott, declined to comment on Thursday.
For crying out loud, just let nature run its course. The horse will kick the bucket soon enough. How bad would the council look if the horse gets injured or killed in transport? The situation moved one woman far enough to threaten violence, though evidently she did so in a way that 'wasn't criminal.' I'd love to learn how she did that, then I'll start committing crimes in a manner that isn't criminal, too. Hopefully all it will earn me is a stern talking to like she received.
http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,424486,00.html
This story was brought to the Dispatch's attention by our good friend, and to our knowledge, the only person who actually reads this blog, Tovilina.
The story is about a former athlete and current unemployed actor (if you are unemployed, couldn't you in theory be unemployed in whatever field you choose? The next time I'm 'on the beach' which is a fancy radio term for being out of work, I'm going to claim to be an unemployed astrophysicist). I thought, ok, I know the names of a lot of athletes and actors. The guy's name? Joseph Petcka.
...
...
Who the fuck is Joseph Petcka?
According to the story, he was dating an attractive and successful Sports Illustrated reporter who had a cat named Norman. Mr. Petcka was enamored with the reporter, and obsessed with earning the cat's affection. He went so far as to journal his progress with the cat. Unfortunately, Norman hated Mr. Petcka. Things culminated with Petcka getting drunk on his girlfriend's booze, threatening to microwave Norman, and eventually kicking the cat to death.
Take a deep breath. Ok. Here's the deal.
Super pretty women and cats are two things in this world that I have little use for. I don't trust them, I don't like being around them, and in the case of cats, I'm allergic to them (pretty women are in fact allergic to me. HA! Thank you! Tip your waittress). I derive a great deal of pleasure from watching beautiful women and cats get taken down a peg or two. Still, this, uh, may have been excessive.
Also, I am not a doctor, but my amateur diagnosis is that Joseph Petcka is completely insane.
In more local news...
LINCOLN, Neb. (AP) - The Lancaster County Sheriff's office found
no crime in an investigation into an alleged threat over a Hickman
horse.
Sergeant Scott Gaston said this evening that a deputy listened
to multiple messages, and that the words weren't criminal.
City Councilman Dave Dykmann says a phone message was left at
city offices Wednesday by a woman threatening to shoot him and the
mayor.
Gaston says while he can't share the message in question, it was
worded differently and the words "weren't criminal."
The person who left the messages was contacted, Gaston said, but
won't face any charges.
Here's an earlier AP story that fills in the details...
LINCOLN, Neb. (AP) - The flap over Peter Rabbit the horse has
turned deadly serious in the small Nebraska town of Hickman.
City Councilman Dave Dykmann says a woman left a phone message
at city offices on Wednesday saying "if I had a gun I'd shoot Dave
Dykmann and the mayor." The woman apparently was upset with the
council's recent decision to uphold its ban on livestock in city
limits and force the 32-year-old horse to leave the pasture where
he was born.
Peter Rabbit's 76-year-old owner, Harley Scott, has said the
horse is too old to move, and the horse remained in the pasture.
Officials have tried to ticket Scott, but Dykmann says the
family seems to have left town.
Harley Scott's son, Jack Scott, declined to comment on Thursday.
For crying out loud, just let nature run its course. The horse will kick the bucket soon enough. How bad would the council look if the horse gets injured or killed in transport? The situation moved one woman far enough to threaten violence, though evidently she did so in a way that 'wasn't criminal.' I'd love to learn how she did that, then I'll start committing crimes in a manner that isn't criminal, too. Hopefully all it will earn me is a stern talking to like she received.
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
AP Wrap Up pt 1
And the nominees for male role model of the year are...
Michael Lohan
Roger Clemens
and this guy
GRAND ISLAND, Neb. (AP) - A 23-year-old man accused of daring
his 5-year-old nephew and a friend to sniff pool chlorine now faces
felony charges.
Juan Pablo Andrade-Escobar had been scheduled to go to trial on
two misdemeanor counts of child abuse. But on Tuesday, the counts
were upgraded to felony child abuse.
Officials say Andrade-Escobar opened a canister of pool chlorine
in July and dared his nephew and a 7-year-old friend of the boy to
smell it.
They did and soon vomited.
The 7-year-old recovered quickly. The younger boy was taken to a
local hospital, then to Children's Hospital in Omaha, where he
remained in critical condition for days.
Inhaling a concentrated doses of chlorine gas can be fatal.
Wow... The parents ought to be ashamed for leaving these kids in the care of an obviously retarded man.
In other news, the Jesus Tribe is on the warpath, working themselves into a self righteous lather with their second attempt to outlaw abortion in the otherwise forward thinking center of humanism that is Souf Dakota...
ABERDEEN, S.D. (AP) - The South Dakota Right to Life state
convention features a doctor who used to perform abortions and the
brother of Terri Schiavo (SHY'-voh) as the main speakers.
Schiavo died in 2005 at the age of 41 after a nationwide debate
over her care. She was diagnosed as being in a persistent
vegetative state after her heart stopped in 1990. Her husband
wanted her feeding tube removed against the wishes of her parents.
Schiavo's brother, Bobby Schindler, now runs a center for health
care ethics.
Also set to speak is Dr. Anthony Levatino of New Mexico, who
plans to tell how he ended his practice of performing abortions.
The convention is scheduled for Oct. 11 in Aberdeen.
What tickles me about this is the inclusion of Terry Schiavo's brother. Is this how he makes extra scratch these days? Touring backwater states and capitalizing on his sister's corpse? He runs a center for health care ethics. The funny thing about ethics is that, sometimes, they are subjective. For example, some people think that pulling Schiavo's feeding tube was tantamount to murder. Other people believe that wasting valuable effort, personnel, and equipment on a vegetable so far past the point of possible recovery that her brain was mostly pudding is unethical. Potato Potato I guess.
I'm in a mood to rip the religious today, and thus far my vitriol has been directed towards Christians. Let's do something about that. Muslims are raising a ruckus all over the place from Minnesota to Nebraska...
WILLMAR, Minn. (AP) - Willmar public school officials are
sticking with their original policy on when to allow Somali
students to pray.
Some Somali parents in Willmar had complained that the public
schools weren't allowing their Muslim children to step out of class
for daily prayer. Some didn't send their children to school last
week in protest.
School officials met with a Somali parent to listen to the
concerns but said they're not changing their policy.
Willmar Junior High School Principal Mark Miley says at a
meeting six years ago, Somali families agreed that their children
could pray during lunch time and between periods. Miley says
everyone at that meeting, including parents, agreed that stepping
out during class to pray would be disruptive.
Muslims observe prayer five times a day. This month, during
Ramadan, the midday prayer falls during class, not lunch time.
Christians lost this battle a long time ago. You still hear far right bitching about getting prayer 'back in schools,' which neglects the fact that prayer has never been kicked out of school. If a child wants to stop before a test to petition the Lord for the correct answers, there is nothing, nothing, that can stop them. What is NOT allowed is mandatory prayer and making a spectacle out of yourself, as the religious have been known to do. As I said the Christians capitulated on this front a long time ago. The Muslims will not go down so easily. They have a knack for imposing their will and culture on their new homelands, as the French and Belgians can tell you. We shall see how this one plays out.
In other Muslim news...
OMAHA, Neb. (AP) - A dispute between Muslim workers and
management at the JBS Swift & Co. plant in Grand Island isn't the
first.
The plant had the same problems last year when Muslim workers
sought accommodations to make their sunset prayer. Dozens of
workers in that dispute quit their jobs in protest. They eventually
returned to work.
Local union president Dan Hoppes says the problem was never
fixed last year. That's one of the reasons he says it emerged again
in recent days.
Hoppes says the current contract doesn't expire until 2010. He
is hopeful that next year, everyone might get out ahead of it and
make adjustments before it becomes an issue again.
Seems as though a reasonable accord was reached here.
Now what needs to be addressed is Somali cooking. When I lived in the Cities, I shared apartment buildings with many Somalis and their cooking smells like garbage and it stinks the whole place up constantly.
Michael Lohan
Roger Clemens
and this guy
GRAND ISLAND, Neb. (AP) - A 23-year-old man accused of daring
his 5-year-old nephew and a friend to sniff pool chlorine now faces
felony charges.
Juan Pablo Andrade-Escobar had been scheduled to go to trial on
two misdemeanor counts of child abuse. But on Tuesday, the counts
were upgraded to felony child abuse.
Officials say Andrade-Escobar opened a canister of pool chlorine
in July and dared his nephew and a 7-year-old friend of the boy to
smell it.
They did and soon vomited.
The 7-year-old recovered quickly. The younger boy was taken to a
local hospital, then to Children's Hospital in Omaha, where he
remained in critical condition for days.
Inhaling a concentrated doses of chlorine gas can be fatal.
Wow... The parents ought to be ashamed for leaving these kids in the care of an obviously retarded man.
In other news, the Jesus Tribe is on the warpath, working themselves into a self righteous lather with their second attempt to outlaw abortion in the otherwise forward thinking center of humanism that is Souf Dakota...
ABERDEEN, S.D. (AP) - The South Dakota Right to Life state
convention features a doctor who used to perform abortions and the
brother of Terri Schiavo (SHY'-voh) as the main speakers.
Schiavo died in 2005 at the age of 41 after a nationwide debate
over her care. She was diagnosed as being in a persistent
vegetative state after her heart stopped in 1990. Her husband
wanted her feeding tube removed against the wishes of her parents.
Schiavo's brother, Bobby Schindler, now runs a center for health
care ethics.
Also set to speak is Dr. Anthony Levatino of New Mexico, who
plans to tell how he ended his practice of performing abortions.
The convention is scheduled for Oct. 11 in Aberdeen.
What tickles me about this is the inclusion of Terry Schiavo's brother. Is this how he makes extra scratch these days? Touring backwater states and capitalizing on his sister's corpse? He runs a center for health care ethics. The funny thing about ethics is that, sometimes, they are subjective. For example, some people think that pulling Schiavo's feeding tube was tantamount to murder. Other people believe that wasting valuable effort, personnel, and equipment on a vegetable so far past the point of possible recovery that her brain was mostly pudding is unethical. Potato Potato I guess.
I'm in a mood to rip the religious today, and thus far my vitriol has been directed towards Christians. Let's do something about that. Muslims are raising a ruckus all over the place from Minnesota to Nebraska...
WILLMAR, Minn. (AP) - Willmar public school officials are
sticking with their original policy on when to allow Somali
students to pray.
Some Somali parents in Willmar had complained that the public
schools weren't allowing their Muslim children to step out of class
for daily prayer. Some didn't send their children to school last
week in protest.
School officials met with a Somali parent to listen to the
concerns but said they're not changing their policy.
Willmar Junior High School Principal Mark Miley says at a
meeting six years ago, Somali families agreed that their children
could pray during lunch time and between periods. Miley says
everyone at that meeting, including parents, agreed that stepping
out during class to pray would be disruptive.
Muslims observe prayer five times a day. This month, during
Ramadan, the midday prayer falls during class, not lunch time.
Christians lost this battle a long time ago. You still hear far right bitching about getting prayer 'back in schools,' which neglects the fact that prayer has never been kicked out of school. If a child wants to stop before a test to petition the Lord for the correct answers, there is nothing, nothing, that can stop them. What is NOT allowed is mandatory prayer and making a spectacle out of yourself, as the religious have been known to do. As I said the Christians capitulated on this front a long time ago. The Muslims will not go down so easily. They have a knack for imposing their will and culture on their new homelands, as the French and Belgians can tell you. We shall see how this one plays out.
In other Muslim news...
OMAHA, Neb. (AP) - A dispute between Muslim workers and
management at the JBS Swift & Co. plant in Grand Island isn't the
first.
The plant had the same problems last year when Muslim workers
sought accommodations to make their sunset prayer. Dozens of
workers in that dispute quit their jobs in protest. They eventually
returned to work.
Local union president Dan Hoppes says the problem was never
fixed last year. That's one of the reasons he says it emerged again
in recent days.
Hoppes says the current contract doesn't expire until 2010. He
is hopeful that next year, everyone might get out ahead of it and
make adjustments before it becomes an issue again.
Seems as though a reasonable accord was reached here.
Now what needs to be addressed is Somali cooking. When I lived in the Cities, I shared apartment buildings with many Somalis and their cooking smells like garbage and it stinks the whole place up constantly.
AP Wrap Up pt 2
The AP Wire was an embarrassment yesterday, so we are making up for it today.
WASHINGTON (AP) - An undercover video shot at an Iowa pig farm
shows workers hitting sows with metal rods, slamming piglets on a
concrete floor and other abuse.
In one incident on the video, a supervisor tells an undercover
investigator for People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals that
when he gets angry, or a sow won't move, he shoves a rod into the
animal's anus.
The farm, located outside of Bayard, Iowa, is about 60 miles
west of Des Moines. It is a supplier to Hormel Foods of Austin,
Minnesota.
This isn't the full story, the rest is blobbidy blah stuff about what PETA wants done. This story is notable for this line:
"when he gets angry, or a sow won't move, he shoves a rod into the animal's anus."
I bring this up simply because I have enjoyed some success employing a similar tactic when stuck behind slow moving old or fat (or old AND fat) people at the Mall of America.
Moving on...
OMAHA, Neb. (AP) - The 40-year-old victim of a shooting says he
was shot by a man in a wheelchair.
Police say the shooting happened at 1:34 a.m. Wednesday in a
mid-town neighborhood. Police say officers found Patrick Amburn
injured in the street. He told officers he was walking down the
street when he was shot by a man in a wheelchair.
Amburn was take to the hospital with a gunshot wound to his
back. His injuries are not considered life-threatening.
Police have not reported an arrest in the case.
My thoughts on this story are two fold. First, how many gun toting people in wheelchairs can there be in Omaha? Make an arrest, OPD. Second, this reminds me of a quadrapalegic I knew in my home town. He had limited use of his upper extremities and was outfitted with an enormous van so he could get around. That's fine, great, whatever. The problem was he would get drunk and then drive like an absolute maniac on a consistent basis. Not that his behavior was any more aggregious than an able bodied serial drunk driver. It just prompted me to think, "Just because HE doesn't have anything to lose doesn't mean than no one else does either." I considered that perhaps it was a form of paralytic vampirism, a desire to, through his actions, make others like him.
THAT story reminds me of a wretched disney movie in which Frankie Muniz portrayed a kid in a wheel chair who was determined to win some manner of derby race. You know, those unpowered little home made cars that people push down hills and viaducts and the point is to keep your head down and not steer your car into the sidewalk. It was called 'Miracle in Lane 2' (thank you imdb.com).
The term miracle seems excessive to me. All the kid did was not wreck his little car and beat some other little kids to the bottom of the hill. Now, had he gotten out up out of his conveyance and hopped on a unicycle, THAT would have been a miracle. I digress.
The reason I mention it is because at some point Justin Yoder's (Muniz) mother or father or someone says 'If God had wanted everyone to be the same we would have been in wheelchairs.' That's laughable, yet not nearly as strange as one of the movie's closing scenes. I thought the implication was that Justin had died, as he seems to be dreaming of entering heaven, and upon his arrival, everyone has wings and, lo and behold, wheelchairs. This begs an obvious question and has some terrifying implications.
The question is 'If everyone has wings, why do they then also require the wheelchairs. The horrible impications are that:
A. There is a seperate, presumably shittier heaven reserved for the disabled. What, God, you can't give these poor sad fuckers the use of their legs in the afterlife?
OR
B. Immediately upon entry into heaven St. Peter breaks everyone's backs and confines them to an eternity in a wheelchair.
Both are terrible prospects, indeed, until you remember that God is a silly fairy tale.
WASHINGTON (AP) - An undercover video shot at an Iowa pig farm
shows workers hitting sows with metal rods, slamming piglets on a
concrete floor and other abuse.
In one incident on the video, a supervisor tells an undercover
investigator for People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals that
when he gets angry, or a sow won't move, he shoves a rod into the
animal's anus.
The farm, located outside of Bayard, Iowa, is about 60 miles
west of Des Moines. It is a supplier to Hormel Foods of Austin,
Minnesota.
This isn't the full story, the rest is blobbidy blah stuff about what PETA wants done. This story is notable for this line:
"when he gets angry, or a sow won't move, he shoves a rod into the animal's anus."
I bring this up simply because I have enjoyed some success employing a similar tactic when stuck behind slow moving old or fat (or old AND fat) people at the Mall of America.
Moving on...
OMAHA, Neb. (AP) - The 40-year-old victim of a shooting says he
was shot by a man in a wheelchair.
Police say the shooting happened at 1:34 a.m. Wednesday in a
mid-town neighborhood. Police say officers found Patrick Amburn
injured in the street. He told officers he was walking down the
street when he was shot by a man in a wheelchair.
Amburn was take to the hospital with a gunshot wound to his
back. His injuries are not considered life-threatening.
Police have not reported an arrest in the case.
My thoughts on this story are two fold. First, how many gun toting people in wheelchairs can there be in Omaha? Make an arrest, OPD. Second, this reminds me of a quadrapalegic I knew in my home town. He had limited use of his upper extremities and was outfitted with an enormous van so he could get around. That's fine, great, whatever. The problem was he would get drunk and then drive like an absolute maniac on a consistent basis. Not that his behavior was any more aggregious than an able bodied serial drunk driver. It just prompted me to think, "Just because HE doesn't have anything to lose doesn't mean than no one else does either." I considered that perhaps it was a form of paralytic vampirism, a desire to, through his actions, make others like him.
THAT story reminds me of a wretched disney movie in which Frankie Muniz portrayed a kid in a wheel chair who was determined to win some manner of derby race. You know, those unpowered little home made cars that people push down hills and viaducts and the point is to keep your head down and not steer your car into the sidewalk. It was called 'Miracle in Lane 2' (thank you imdb.com).
The term miracle seems excessive to me. All the kid did was not wreck his little car and beat some other little kids to the bottom of the hill. Now, had he gotten out up out of his conveyance and hopped on a unicycle, THAT would have been a miracle. I digress.
The reason I mention it is because at some point Justin Yoder's (Muniz) mother or father or someone says 'If God had wanted everyone to be the same we would have been in wheelchairs.' That's laughable, yet not nearly as strange as one of the movie's closing scenes. I thought the implication was that Justin had died, as he seems to be dreaming of entering heaven, and upon his arrival, everyone has wings and, lo and behold, wheelchairs. This begs an obvious question and has some terrifying implications.
The question is 'If everyone has wings, why do they then also require the wheelchairs. The horrible impications are that:
A. There is a seperate, presumably shittier heaven reserved for the disabled. What, God, you can't give these poor sad fuckers the use of their legs in the afterlife?
OR
B. Immediately upon entry into heaven St. Peter breaks everyone's backs and confines them to an eternity in a wheelchair.
Both are terrible prospects, indeed, until you remember that God is a silly fairy tale.
Monday, September 15, 2008
Nikki Sixx Thinks He Invented Rock and Roll
http://www.rollingstone.com/rockdaily/index.php/2008/09/11/nikki-sixx-miley-cyrus-and-the-jonas-brothers-are-not-rock-roll/
Nikki Sixx, a man who has spent the last 20+ years dressing like a drag queen, believes he has the market cornered on what is and what is not rock and roll. He commends two of the most atrocious bands in history, Papa Roach and Buck Cherry, for living up the the Rock Star monker in both sound and behavior.
About that... Motley Crue, Buck Cherry, and Papa Roach all toured together, which I believe would have been an excellent opportunity to kill them all and many of their mongoloid fans by simply blowing up one of the venues they performed at. A shame it didn't work out.
Everytime someone buys one of those band's records, Uncle Sam and Jesus punch each other in the balls to decry to degeneration of Americans, and the world population in general, into pudding slopping idiots. I digress...
Sixx tells Rolling Stone that he was in a Barnes and Noble (some people might think that is weird... I think it's perfect) and he saw Miley Cyrus and the Jonas Brothers being promoted as 'rock and roll,' which probably upset Mr. Sixx so much that his mascara ran down his face. He said that... I'm not sure how to paraphrase it... I'll quote it:
"... What the fuck is this?’ People are believing that shit that is not rock & roll, is not the rock lifestyle, is rock.”
Two things.
1. No one with pubes would mistake Miley Cyrus or the Jonas Brothers for rock and roll.
2. Who in the hell elected this douche bag the keeper of the flame of Chuck Berry and Elvis?
What if one of the Jonas Brothers got hepatitis, another got fat and whored himself out on reality tv, and another nearly killed himself with heroin, would that be rock and roll enough for Nikki Sixx?
It should also be pointed out that Miley Cyrus has proven more than willing to take self portraits in her underwear that somehow, magically, end up on the internet. That's something at least. She's fuckin' 15. How rock and roll were you when you were 15, you Motley Crue dumbshit?
It should be pointed out that I've never heard a Miley Cyrus song or watched her show. I have heard a Jonas Brothers song, but that's only because my station took a break from it's regular rotation of Daughtry and Slaughter to have the song 'S.O.S.' in heavy rotation when I took this job. It's not like I'm a fan.
It's just that Motley Crue needs to die.
Nikki Sixx, a man who has spent the last 20+ years dressing like a drag queen, believes he has the market cornered on what is and what is not rock and roll. He commends two of the most atrocious bands in history, Papa Roach and Buck Cherry, for living up the the Rock Star monker in both sound and behavior.
About that... Motley Crue, Buck Cherry, and Papa Roach all toured together, which I believe would have been an excellent opportunity to kill them all and many of their mongoloid fans by simply blowing up one of the venues they performed at. A shame it didn't work out.
Everytime someone buys one of those band's records, Uncle Sam and Jesus punch each other in the balls to decry to degeneration of Americans, and the world population in general, into pudding slopping idiots. I digress...
Sixx tells Rolling Stone that he was in a Barnes and Noble (some people might think that is weird... I think it's perfect) and he saw Miley Cyrus and the Jonas Brothers being promoted as 'rock and roll,' which probably upset Mr. Sixx so much that his mascara ran down his face. He said that... I'm not sure how to paraphrase it... I'll quote it:
"... What the fuck is this?’ People are believing that shit that is not rock & roll, is not the rock lifestyle, is rock.”
Two things.
1. No one with pubes would mistake Miley Cyrus or the Jonas Brothers for rock and roll.
2. Who in the hell elected this douche bag the keeper of the flame of Chuck Berry and Elvis?
What if one of the Jonas Brothers got hepatitis, another got fat and whored himself out on reality tv, and another nearly killed himself with heroin, would that be rock and roll enough for Nikki Sixx?
It should also be pointed out that Miley Cyrus has proven more than willing to take self portraits in her underwear that somehow, magically, end up on the internet. That's something at least. She's fuckin' 15. How rock and roll were you when you were 15, you Motley Crue dumbshit?
It should be pointed out that I've never heard a Miley Cyrus song or watched her show. I have heard a Jonas Brothers song, but that's only because my station took a break from it's regular rotation of Daughtry and Slaughter to have the song 'S.O.S.' in heavy rotation when I took this job. It's not like I'm a fan.
It's just that Motley Crue needs to die.
Why the Hell Does this Station Play So Much Slaughter?
If there is a radio station in America giving heavier rotation to Slaughter and BB Mak than the one I work at, I'll eat my fuckin' shoe.
Last Thursday marked the Anniversary of, uh... what was it? Oh yeah, the terror attacks. Governor Mike Rounds called for Souf Dakotans to remain 'vigilant,' what ever the hell that means. Seriously, I want to know what he means by that. Here is a my dramatic representation of what 'vigilance' in Souf Dakota means...
911 Operator: 9-1-1, what the is the nature of your emergency?
Caller: Uhhhhh, this here is Randy Sabotka, I was jis in town at the diner, en I seen me one uh them Al Qaidas.
911 Operator: What makes you say you saw a terrorist, sir?
Caller: Well, uh, he, uh... he weren't white.
911 Operator: Holy Ass! I'll call for the National Guard!
I have no idea how to be extra 'vigilant.' Spy on my neighbors? Go through their mail? I'm willing to do that, I just need to know that is what's expected.
In other Souf Dakota news, from the AP...
ABERDEEN, S.D. (AP) - A Groton woman, Betty Breck, has asked the South Dakota Open Meetings Commission to decide whether the Brown County Commission violated the state open meetings law.She says the county did not properly post the agenda to Tuesday's meeting at least 24 hours in advance.Breck says she went to the courthouse shortly after 6 p.m. Monday and saw a blank piece of paper taped on an inside window, which is where the agenda usually is posted.State's Attorney Kimberly Dorsett says there's a simple explanation: The agenda was inadvertently taped backwards.The Open Meetings Commission monitors possible infractions and can issue reprimands. Breck has filed other complaints with the panel since it was formed in 2004.
The headline for this article should have been 'Lonely Old Cat Woman Needs to Find Something Constructive to Do.' The last sentence of the article tells me all I need to know about one Betty Breck. She:
Has no kids
Owns at least 6 cats and dresses them up in little outfits that no one else sees
Wears sweaters, even in July
and lastly
She is one of those annoying busy bodies that seem to be in an endless supply in small towns. She makes trouble with this 'Open Meetings Committee' to feel important. Hell, she does it to not feel bored.
It could be worse. She could be slapping her genitals against church windows.
Last Thursday marked the Anniversary of, uh... what was it? Oh yeah, the terror attacks. Governor Mike Rounds called for Souf Dakotans to remain 'vigilant,' what ever the hell that means. Seriously, I want to know what he means by that. Here is a my dramatic representation of what 'vigilance' in Souf Dakota means...
911 Operator: 9-1-1, what the is the nature of your emergency?
Caller: Uhhhhh, this here is Randy Sabotka, I was jis in town at the diner, en I seen me one uh them Al Qaidas.
911 Operator: What makes you say you saw a terrorist, sir?
Caller: Well, uh, he, uh... he weren't white.
911 Operator: Holy Ass! I'll call for the National Guard!
I have no idea how to be extra 'vigilant.' Spy on my neighbors? Go through their mail? I'm willing to do that, I just need to know that is what's expected.
In other Souf Dakota news, from the AP...
ABERDEEN, S.D. (AP) - A Groton woman, Betty Breck, has asked the South Dakota Open Meetings Commission to decide whether the Brown County Commission violated the state open meetings law.She says the county did not properly post the agenda to Tuesday's meeting at least 24 hours in advance.Breck says she went to the courthouse shortly after 6 p.m. Monday and saw a blank piece of paper taped on an inside window, which is where the agenda usually is posted.State's Attorney Kimberly Dorsett says there's a simple explanation: The agenda was inadvertently taped backwards.The Open Meetings Commission monitors possible infractions and can issue reprimands. Breck has filed other complaints with the panel since it was formed in 2004.
The headline for this article should have been 'Lonely Old Cat Woman Needs to Find Something Constructive to Do.' The last sentence of the article tells me all I need to know about one Betty Breck. She:
Has no kids
Owns at least 6 cats and dresses them up in little outfits that no one else sees
Wears sweaters, even in July
and lastly
She is one of those annoying busy bodies that seem to be in an endless supply in small towns. She makes trouble with this 'Open Meetings Committee' to feel important. Hell, she does it to not feel bored.
It could be worse. She could be slapping her genitals against church windows.
Yeah, I Had Fun in High School Too, Lady, but...
http://ap.google.com/article/ALeqM5ipppcZU-H4xC9lQiAOQFSF-cfrdAD935H3G80
It's never too late to teach an old Sconnie new tricks. That's what Wendy Brown of Green Bay set out ot prove when she enrolled in high school and joined the cheerleading squad. Here's the problem...
Brown is 33 years old and she enrolled under the identity of her daughter, who lives with her grandmother in Nevada.
WHOOPS.
Click on the link and examine the woman's picture. That is the most haggard looking 16 year old cheerleader I've ever seen. Maybe she looks better with make up. Who knows.
She attended cheer practices prior to the start of the school year, was given a cheerleader's locker, and attended a pool party at the coach's house. That a 33 year old mother could pull off a cheerleaders body is surprising.
Of course, this IS Wisconsin we are talking about. Perhaps it's par for the course for the cheerleaders to have stretch marks and breasts that hang down to their thighs.
It's never too late to teach an old Sconnie new tricks. That's what Wendy Brown of Green Bay set out ot prove when she enrolled in high school and joined the cheerleading squad. Here's the problem...
Brown is 33 years old and she enrolled under the identity of her daughter, who lives with her grandmother in Nevada.
WHOOPS.
Click on the link and examine the woman's picture. That is the most haggard looking 16 year old cheerleader I've ever seen. Maybe she looks better with make up. Who knows.
She attended cheer practices prior to the start of the school year, was given a cheerleader's locker, and attended a pool party at the coach's house. That a 33 year old mother could pull off a cheerleaders body is surprising.
Of course, this IS Wisconsin we are talking about. Perhaps it's par for the course for the cheerleaders to have stretch marks and breasts that hang down to their thighs.
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